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I spend a lot of time cruising the internet out of boredom,
and I come across a lot of crazy/stupid stuff but this fluff has to be the very worst so far.
Here is a link to the site tsoalr.com - View topic - Custom Army Anyone?
But for anyone to lazy to click here it is.
By : mad944
Post :Well, after the incredible failure....
Ok, incredible failure that was badly painted and in more than a few cases poorly modelled....
Ok, the badly painted, sneak-around-and-smash-people-bright-gold Space Marine Army that was the Sons of Septimius, although they annihiliated my brother time and time again, and the fact that to be honest, Burnished Gold with Chestnut Ink on top is very very difficult indeed to get right, I decided to start up a new chapter.
So far, it's won every game.
100% win record.
Lost five men total.
Annihiliated an Imperial Guard army.
And that was with 11 models.
No. of games played?
Well, one. BUT it still won :p
The models are all extensively converted, I put some up in the Your Pride and Joy thread. Black with grey pads.
The fluff... Bear in mind, this is the first incarnation. Written for the first time in this post.
During the Horus Heresy, there were many who believed that Chaos would reign supreme and the Imperium reduced to ashes. Some among the Cult fo the Machine God realised that whatever the cost, the Imperium would end as a shattered husk of what it once was, and made good their escape. Seizing what they could of the STC machines and other technology, they ran to the outer reaches of the galaxy whereupon they settled upon a planet they designated Xulon in the Corbantis system.
From there, they watched as the Imperium was shattered from the inside out, aas the Adepts of Terra took over and made the Imperium as they willed it, as it was shaken time and time again by xenos, chaos, and itself.
Realising they needed a military force, they began work on it. Among the STC machines they had managed to salvage there was something more valuable than they had even begun to imagine.
Looking through the software of a supercomputer aboard the capital ship they had escaped on, they found designs for Mk 3 Thunder Armour. They began working on these designs, and before long had managed to make armour as powerful as the power armour that the Space Marines used. It wasn't the same, but it was close enough-they lacked the geneseed. A crack team of experts began work upon the computer, looking for a reference.
Meanwhile, factories had been set up, production had begun for a Stormtrooper force capable of rivalling three regiments of the Imperial Guard, should the need arise.
It was not ready fast enough. The original denizens of the system, almost similar to the megarachnid that the 63rd Expedition had encountered during the Great Crusade, attacked before anything could really be done about the army, although they were repelled by automated turret systems already installed.
The Stormtrooper program was accelerated, and alternate methods of accruing troops were developed-cloning.
Soon enough, a third of the force was complete, with genetics from 20 different specimens, all the peak of humankind.
The next time the Lessmegarachnid attacked, they were repelled with ease.
it was then that the first in a series of breakthroughs occured. The Mechanicum found that by using Lessmegarachnid secretion in combination with certain other chemicals and certain body parts that imroved humans could be bred-that they could breed superhuman warriors, growing faster and living for an indeterminable amount of time.
As far as they could tell, they had managed to breed warriors equal to the Space Marines of the Imperium-almost human, as well, aside from certain deformities that became the butt of many jokes in the Stormtrooper regiments.
(I'll, ah, leave those deformities out. This is a family forum...)
However, they soon found that for some reason, these warriors had coal-black skin. Setting them apart from the rest of the populace, and humanity for that matter, it gave them their name-the Black Death.
So was formed the Black Death Legion.
The next breakthrough was the development of Terminator armour, or at least a form of Terminator armour-this afforded the Black Death Legion greater close combat prowess, and also allowed them to put a weapon down if necessary.
In the coming years, New Man, as the breakaways christened themselves, saw the annihiliation of the Lessmegarachnid and the downfall of the Imperium. Encountering the Tau before the Imperium, they managed to forge a good relationship with them, until the Imperium first attacked-since then, the O-Shovah faction has broken all contact with New Man and diplomatic hell has ensued with the rest of the Tau Empire. However, many times have occured recently where Fire Warriors have stood shouder to shoulder with the Stormtrooper regiments and shoulder to waist with the Black Death legion.
The breakaway faction does not harbour any hate for the Imperium, no matter how fallen the Imperium may be. They will not attack aside from in the most dire of circumstances, although they will happily defend their borders from Imperial forces.
However, they have attacked Chaos many times, if they find an army moving too close to them.
Compared to the Imperium they do not get along badly with the Eldar, although the Eldar harbour the same arrogance for them as they do the Imperium.
All negotiations with the Dark Eldar, Orks, and Tyranids have failed. As a matter of fact, they did not even get their ambassador back from the Tyranids, although an intense psychic scream was detected from the point where the ambassador was last seen several years later.
Finally, New Man has sent several scouting expeditions into the psychic darkness at the edge of the galaxy. None have, as of yet, returned.
End of fluff. Please note, this is rough and will probably be improved at some point.
For the army, I use the Spacce Marine codex, allthough changing it a little-I do not use Space Marine Terminators, instead having 0-1 squads of Grey Knight terminators (it's legal) and I use 0-1 Grey Knight Teleport Attack Squads as fast attack (also legal.)
And I also use Grandmasters. Hey, it's legal and it adds character to the army.
Maybe we could start a thread for the worst cases of 40k fan fluff?
But I doubt anyone can make up anything worse than that!
I AM BOOMER!
Not so.His fluff is suggesting that a "deformity" that sets the apart from Humanity is that there skin is black, and so they're named the "Black Death."This suggests that said deformities most likely have something to do with sexual organs.aside from certain deformities that became the butt of many jokes in the Stormtrooper regiments.
(I'll, ah, leave those deformities out. This is a family forum...)That bit you posted... suffice to say, I've seen much worse before. It's not exactly right with the canon fluff, but could be made to work with a deal of actual effort on author's part (but that seems to be sorely lacking).But I doubt anyone can make up anything worse than that!
But don't underestimate the people.
Check some pieces posted on this very forum, just yesterday. You'll recognize the ones I'm talking about almost right away.
And then there's some of mine, for which I probably deseve a heavy beating.
Especially the last one - I mean, even I can't remember whate the hell it was supposed to be a prologue of. :p
Last edited by The Fifth Horseman; June 17th, 2008 at 18:06.
Cracks me up that he has them try and negotiate an alliance with the 'Nids. At least he doesnt have the alliance attempt succeed, but the mere suggestion was bad enough...
Last edited by Zarak; June 17th, 2008 at 16:59.
Increasing the diversity of the 40k universe through the destruction of Space Marines, one army at a time...
d'oh. How do you spell hurray? horray? Anyway, that word. It's lucky you realised people would be too lazy to click the link, or i couldn't have read that.
anyway, that was awful. (although i probably shouldn't be too harsh here 'cos i write fluff.)
Thats some fairly horrible stuff, but honestly, I've seen worse. I can't remember where it was I witnessed the ultimate horror of fluff mangling to make a superhuman force, but needless to say it was terrible.
Gargrimz Green Deff
W:10 D:4 L:5
LO really isn't the correct place for this type of thread.
If you see someone who's struggling, why not help them out?
And if they won't listen, just ignore them.
Either way, trash talking people - especially from other sites really isn't cool.
So, for this reason I am closing this thread.
LO RulesOriginally Posted by AnonymousOriginally Posted by Cyric