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  1. #1
    Banned ArchonFarseerGuy's Avatar
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    458 (x8)

    Of Marines and Men (Fluff comp entry)

    Had this written up for a while, so I figured that I may as well post now. Enjoy.

    -Of Marines and Men-

    The Hydaspes Sector features several planets, each varying in size and significance, but none have a history as avid as that of Athadian XV. Throughout its multi-millennial history, the planet has had more than its fair share of heresies, plagues, and other raving events. The greatest and thus most volatile occurred not during the great Horus Uprising, but rather, several millennia subsequently. The unblinking, pitiless, and paranoid eyes of the Inquisition had left the planet, the threat of the xenos ever-dwindling, and the might of the Loyalist Guardsmen was thinning as more frontiers were founded. The insipid influence of Chaos had grown in the planet’s capital city- Athadian Prime. The leader was a cunning and charismatic clergyman named Dekker. After the majority of the loyalist forces had been stationed elsewhere in the Sector, he made his move.

    ***

    Prior to the Great Crusade, the Emperor founded the mighty Space Marines, all of which served as his loyal servants to some extent. As time wore on, new Chapters were created from a parent Chapter. The Crimson Furies descended from the Blood Angels. The Liberators were formed of the Ultramarines; and the Imperial Fists of Dorn spawned the zealous Black Templar’s. As the Empire of Humanity grew, these Chapters became more widespread, and these Second Founding Chapters forged their own, Third Founding Chapters. Off the Black Templar’s came The Emperors Black Guard, zealous upholders of Imperial Creed who’s short-ranged ferocity terrified most opponents. As the Imperials moved into the Hydaspes Sector, the Black Guard were rewarded with their own moon on Athadian XV, on which they built their blessed Fortress Monastery.

    ***

    Fortunately for the loyalist forces- who would under normal circumstances be outnumbered 3:1- a distress signal was sent out as the heresy began. Thousands upon thousands of Traitor Guard took up arms. A series of skirmishes broke out, squads on both sides launching deadly ambushes on their foe before disappearing back into the ruined buildings once more. None remained in the same position for extended periods of time, for this was the warfare of the Cityfight Specialists of Athadian. Severely outnumbered, the Imperialists proved to be heroes, and the line was held long enough for aid to arrive in the form of Athadians from other cities and the swamps, the legions of Ordo Hereticus and Adepta Sororitas, and the dreaded Emperors Black Guard.

    ***

    With The Emperors Black Guard now stationed, they acted as reinforcements to further incursions into the Eastern Fringe, and as a rapid redeployment force, ready to jump to the defence of a planet, should the need arise. Then, an admin mix-up found their gene-seed corrupted. The error was soon discovered, and erased from Inquisitorial records, but for The Emperors Black Guard, it was too late. Their genetic make-up soon incorporated segments found in the frenzied Blood Angels. Their piety and devotion still remained as unerring, but they began to develop a true killer’s instinct, and noted a strange pleasure in butchering the enemies of the Imperium. The results were terrifying to behold. They were eight-foot monsters, overzealous to the Imperial Creed. Nevertheless, their gene-seed had been altered, so the Black Guard were permanently under scrutiny from the Inquisition.

    ***

    The battle on the streets was fierce. On both sides, units worked cohesively, proving greater than the sum of their parts. Great Hellhounds cleared the buildings, while troopers moved in, taking advantage of the extra-afforded cover, and the advantageous vantage points. However, as the battle’s climax was reached, signs grew ominous for the heretics, as dark shapes appeared in the sky, heralding the arrival of Inquisitorial Spacecraft, and the Drop Pods of the fearsome Emperors Black Guard. The Adepta Sororitas purged the taint of Chaos from the ruins, as The Black Guard overwhelmed the traitors through resilience and sheer brutality. These newcomers proved decisive, and the heretics withdrew into the dark, foreboding swamps of Athadian XV, all the while pursued by the loyalist Guardsmen. With the Traitor Legions in full flight, The Black Guard and Inquisitorial forces withdrew, and the Athadians were left to recover from the blow previously dealt to them. Afterwards, all went quiet...for the time being.

    ***

    10 years later...
    +++Incoming Transmission+++ Sir!!! We’ve come under heavy fire by what seems like a well-crafted ambush at co-ordinates 0-4-XY-Delta, opening fire upon my Reconnaissance unit. The troopers emerged from the swamps with grenades/meltaguns STATIC...Aaaaargh!!!...STATIC...+++End Transmission+++ Last transmission from Veteran Sergeant Brin, Captain of the VI Recon Company. Missing, Presumed Dead.

    ***

    As time wore on, the attacks on the loyalist regiments became ever-more frequent and daring. Entire regiments were ambushed as they marched through the swamps. Swamp fighting specialists disappeared without a trace. However, by far the bravest attacks were on Athadian Prime itself. The rebels used Hit-and-Run tactics, striking at the mighty walls of the city, before fading back into the dark, misted forested swamps. It was at this critical point in time that the High Lords of Athadian were prompted into retaliation. Entire regiments of grunts and swamp fighters were raised and drafted from throughout the planet. The forces of Ordo Hereticus were recalled back to the planet, and the entirety of 3 mighty Companies of The Emperors Black Guard were called to the planet which they had just delivered to root out and destroy the Chaos scum once and for all.

    ***

    The Reconnaissance Companies were tag-teamed for subsequent missions. Each company was stealthily followed by another, so should an ambush transpire, support would be present. Rebel presence was noted, and subsequently recorded. When the time came to flush them out, the Imperialists were ready, and well prepared. Scouts moved forwards, engaging the heretics in skirmishes. This allowed the puritan Sisters of Battle to flush them from their positions, or the Emperors Black Guard to engage in a deadly melee, arcing their eviscerating Chainswords ferociously, offering the rebels no respite.
    As the traitors lost ground, they began to fight back harder, and the loyalists were severely taxed for every inch they claimed. Thus, as it was in the city, a lethal battle of guerrilla warfare began in the reeking, stagnant swamps of Athadian. Every copse that could previously have been safe grew the potential to harbour a lethal squad of swamp fighters. Every bubbling pool of thick, dark mud had potential to host a squad submerged beneath its brooding, unmoving surface. Though unaccustomed to this new environment, The Emperors Black Guard proved stoic in their endeavours, and the heretics quailed before their pious fury. The Sisters, too, proved formidable, flamers flushing rebels from their positions. United, the Imperialists were next to invincible, and the traitors were forced to retreat to (and subsequently revealing of) their hidden swamp fortress. To prevent the continuation of this futile war, the decision was made to lay siege to the fortress. Battle lines were drawn, supplies were cut, and co-ordinates were taken so mighty Basilisks could rain bombardments from afar, and both sides knuckled down in preparation of a long, bloody fight.

    The rebels’ base was extremely well fortified, braving ceaseless Orbital Bombardments and Heavy Weapons fire. The loyalists also found themselves sorely outnumbered, and had second thoughts about breaching the base prematurely. Henceforth, the bombardments continued for many long months. Eventually, Inquisitor Lord Hendricks was deposed from his position of command, to be replaced by Inquisitor Lord Frederina. Under her command, Colonel Brady led his Demo Squad onto the mighty gates of the fortress by night, and by the subceeding morning, the gate had met the same fate as the evil Horus. With the gates removed, the Imperial forces flooded in, met with teems of faithless heretics, and a penultimate Cityfight ensued. Though filled with righteous fervour, their opposition proved too numerous, and the loyalists were forced to retreat in the face of obscenely superior numbers.

    However, The Emperors Black Guard refused to retreat, fighting on to the very end. Their blood-curdling battle-cries striking fear into the hearts of the traitors, their holy bolters mowing down scores of rebels, and their unearthly desire for bloodshed sated in vicious melee, even the Tactical Marines proved to be ruthless killing machines with their combat knives. They weathered endless lasfire though it were a sea mist; acting as more of an irritant than anything else, chanting monotonically as they did so. To prevent her allies from being swamped and potentially overwhelmed, Frederina reluctantly ordered the loyalists to move back into the city, but with a more conservative approach. They army advanced as a relatively tight-knit force, flanked by a series of vanguards to prevent envelopment by vastly superior numbers.

    The Emperors Black Guard continued on towards the end of the city, Assault Marines dropping in from above, overwhelming guardsmen squads with unadulterated brute force. Melee-based Terminators powered through the ruins, smashing aside resistance with their mighty Thunder Hammers. However, the most formidable force was Company Master Dieter of the 1st Company and his retinue of Honour Guard with Librarian Maximillian searing his foes with psychic lightning, Chaplain Matthias arousing the Marines’ inner anger with fiery oratories of faith, and the Champion Crixus killing the cream of the enemy with his ancient and revered Honour Blade.

    As the Marines approached the Munitorium Beareu (the cities’ main HQ), Dekker unleashed his most deadly and vicious weapon- a horrid blend of various creatures inhabiting the swamps of Athadian. Driven by the pain they were in, the frenzied beasts surged forwards- towards The Black Guard. As the first terrifying monstrosity approached the forwards Tactical Marines, they were unprepared, and the gigantic mass of legs, claws, and pulsating flesh was able to rip them limb from limb. As it approached the Honour Guard, Crixus stepped forwards, Honour blade in a defensive position, ready to buy Dieter some valuable time. As the fiend reared on its hind legs, ready to strike down the self-sacrificing Champion, he thrust his blade upwards into the monsters’ freshly exposed chest. As the spear made its impact felt, the creature collapsed into the coagulating pool of its’ own shiny, gurgling, dark crimson pool of its own blood. The remaining monsters were either shredded in a hail of bolter fire, or slain by the hands of the vicious elites of The Black Guard.

    Inquisitor Lord Frederina saw the Traitor Guard falling back, she ordered a pursuit. Chimeras, Rhinos, and Immolators were boarded once more, Seraphim soared high above the buildings, and the jeep-like Sentinels moved ahead as the rebels were pushed back into the Munitorium, ready to fortify their position.

    The Emperors Black Guard arrived at the Beareu to find it locked, fortified, and well defended. After a brief fire-fight, it became apparent were not about to be forced out through anything other than a storming, so Dieter ordered his Assault Terminators forwards, to bash down the door. Sergeant Schwalger and his squad proved to be mighty warriors, protected by their Adamantium casings, and nigh-impervious to all shooting, and on the seventh blow from their Thunder Hammers, the gate relented.

    Through the sea of Guardsmen and Conscripts the Terminators waded, the echo of their Hammers resounding boldly throughout the hall, the electric sizzle of their Lightning Claws also emanating an echo, as did their righteous battlecries. Heretical Kasrkin fell before the might of The Emperors Black Guard, and even Dekker’s’ Ogryns put up little resistance. As a final stand, Dekker charged out with his Apostate bodyguards engaging Dieter in a battle of leaders. Though his Eviscerator was large, Dieter was protected by his Iron Halo, and it only required a single blow from his ancient Powerfist to slay the preacher, ending the uprising. Crixus and the others from Dieters’ retinue also were able to finish off their opponents with ease. With Dekker’s head severed and placed on top of the Company Banner dripping all its gore, the Guardsmen lost heart, and Inquisitor Lord Frederina arrived to several thousand surrendered Guardsmen.

    ***

    With the uprising over, the prisoners were taken off to prisons elsewhere, before their mass executions. Crixus was promoted to Captain, Dieter himself received the Honorifica Imperialis, and Athadian XV was restored back to the way it used to be.

    -AFG//

    Last edited by ArchonFarseerGuy; July 20th, 2008 at 12:55.

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  3. #2
    Banned ArchonFarseerGuy's Avatar
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    458 (x8)

    *cough* Gentle bump.

    If no-one's interested, then I shall simply let it rot.

    -AFG//

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    Senior Member khazad varn's Avatar
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    Wicked story mate.
    Rep. "Ding"
    Yes people i know that my spelling and punctuation is awful but I am product of British teaching pollicies so what can I do about it?

  5. #4
    CKO
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    Excellent fight scenes

    I did not relate with the characters however you should give a brief description of their history or some of their accomplishments so people would have some sort of attachment with the main characters.

    I wish I could describe battle scenes like you, good job

  6. #5
    I'm back >.> Pickle's Avatar
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    262 (x7)

    Fight scenes are well detailed, good job, should do well in the Fluff Comp.
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  7. #6
    Banned ArchonFarseerGuy's Avatar
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    458 (x8)

    Quote Originally Posted by Ckok View Post
    Excellent fight scenes

    I did not relate with the characters however you should give a brief description of their history or some of their accomplishments so people would have some sort of attachment with the main characters.

    I wish I could describe battle scenes like you, good job
    Problem is, we have a 2K word limit, so I had to skip out my usual style of describing everything in-depth, and the imagery is a bit compromised.

    But thanks for the feedback everyone, much appreciated.

    -AFG//

  8. #7
    Member rhammi's Avatar
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    Hey I liked the story I just had a few comments on it hope they can answer some of my own and others questions. I'm no Imperial fluff expert either so sorry if these seem simple minded.

    Quote Originally Posted by ArchonFarseerGuy View Post
    Throughout its multi-millennial history, the planet has had more than its fair share of heresies, plagues, and other raving events. The greatest and thus most volatile occurred not during the great Horus Uprising, but rather, 35 millennia subsequently.
    I think that the crusades happened in M30-M31. and the Horus Heresy was shortly thereafter. Fluff to this point goes into early M42. However, your story occurs ~23,000 years after all that? That is an awful long time for things to not change a whole lot in the universe.

    Quote Originally Posted by ArchonFarseerGuy View Post
    The forces of Ordo Hereticus were recalled back to the planet, and the entire 3rd, 15th, and the dreaded 8th Companies of The Emperors Black Guard were called to the planet which they had just delivered to root out and destroy the Chaos scum once and for all.
    Black Templars are rumored to have numbers in the thousands, however no standing number such stands as it goes against Codex Astartes (1000 Marine Chapters). So to openly have a 15th Company would be to imply that there are at least 1500 troops and I'm fairly sure the Inquisition (assuming they're still around in M65), would have a fit about this.

    Quote Originally Posted by ArchonFarseerGuy View Post
    Melee-based Terminators powered through the ruins, smashing aside resistance with their mighty Thunder Hammers. However, the most formidable force was Company Master Dieter of the 8th Company and his retinue of Honour Guard with Librarian Maximillian searing his foes with psychic lightning, Chaplain Matthias arousing the Marines’ inner anger with fiery oratories of faith, and the Champion Crixus killing the cream of the enemy with his ancient and revered Honour Blade.
    Once again as this is drastically in the future Codex rules may have changed but assuming they're the same as they are in the early 40th millennia,.. Terminators are only a part of 1st Company along with veterans (my remembering back to 3rd edition codex SM - could be wrong on this). Also I think 8th Company had something to do with vehicles so I doubt there would be a Company Master out on foot (could have changed I guess). And I'm sure to have all those characters of the chapter represented there may be more than just 300 marines there...

    Overall a good story I just am a bit confused on the time line fitting into the 40K universe and SM organization in general.
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  9. #8
    Banned ArchonFarseerGuy's Avatar
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    458 (x8)

    Quote Originally Posted by rhammi View Post
    Hey I liked the story I just had a few comments on it hope they can answer some of my own and others questions. I'm no Imperial fluff expert either so sorry if these seem simple minded.



    I think that the crusades happened in M30-M31. and the Horus Heresy was shortly thereafter. Fluff to this point goes into early M42. However, your story occurs ~23,000 years after all that? That is an awful long time for things to not change a whole lot in the universe.



    Black Templars are rumored to have numbers in the thousands, however no standing number such stands as it goes against Codex Astartes (1000 Marine Chapters). So to openly have a 15th Company would be to imply that there are at least 1500 troops and I'm fairly sure the Inquisition (assuming they're still around in M65), would have a fit about this.



    Once again as this is drastically in the future Codex rules may have changed but assuming they're the same as they are in the early 40th millennia,.. Terminators are only a part of 1st Company along with veterans (my remembering back to 3rd edition codex SM - could be wrong on this). Also I think 8th Company had something to do with vehicles so I doubt there would be a Company Master out on foot (could have changed I guess). And I'm sure to have all those characters of the chapter represented there may be more than just 300 marines there...

    Overall a good story I just am a bit confused on the time line fitting into the 40K universe and SM organization in general.
    *head-desk* Thankyou for pointing out these oversights. I'll get them amended.

    What do you think now?

    -AFG//

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    Member rhammi's Avatar
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    Changes definitely cleared some things up. One more thing... I feel like good fluff doesnt reference 'smurts' even though I do. And the things I pointed out I realize in no way really reference the story they're the just the sort of things I've been looking at to try and fit my own custom chapter into the 40K timeline (not an easy task - theres always some piece of information that makes it wrong grrrrr...). Nice work.
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    458 (x8)

    Quote Originally Posted by rhammi View Post
    Changes definitely cleared some things up. One more thing... I feel like good fluff doesnt reference 'smurts' even though I do. And the things I pointed out I realize in no way really reference the story they're the just the sort of things I've been looking at to try and fit my own custom chapter into the 40K timeline (not an easy task - theres always some piece of information that makes it wrong grrrrr...). Nice work.
    Yeah, there is a reason I called them "the ever-boring smurfs". But after this, and a couple of messages (*cough*hatemail*cough*), I'll just call them Ultramarines, and drop the lapdogs thing as well.

    ED: The Linkback isn't working, which sucks because I want to see who linked this.

    -AFG//
    Last edited by ArchonFarseerGuy; July 20th, 2008 at 12:56.

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