My first bit of Fluff (Dark Eldar) - Warhammer 40K Fantasy
 

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  1. #1
    Member Dims's Avatar
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    My first bit of Fluff (Dark Eldar)

    Hey there, so this is the first piece of Fluff for a huge campaign that's been going on with me and some pals for about a year now.

    One of my friends plays an Ordo Malleus Inquisitor obtained a chest containing the essence of a very powerful Daemon. My friend did the responsible thing, and put it on a convoy to Saturn's moon. However, my Kabal had something different to say about that. A Dracon's force raided the convoy and obtained the box.

    The Kabal was then hired out by a Rogue Imperial Governor who promised a yearly tithe of humans to the slave pens of my kabal in order to help him 'liberate' himself from the Iron rule of the Imperium. The Dracon was happy to oblige, and well... this is what ended up happening.

    So tell me what you think!



    After so much work. Countless hours not spent at the gladiatorial games, at war, or in the torture dens of the Kabal. Dracon Chuculas Duskvenom now obtained an upper hand from his master. Launching a successful attack on an Imperial convoy en route to Saturn's moon, Titan, Duskvenom recieved the box he heard so many rumors about. The box that containted the essence of the great Daemon Zaelmathas.

    "Honestly, your most graceful and dreadful master," said a young warrior, who had just been inducted into the Kabal. "I really don't think that this box contains.."

    Those were the last words he spoke, as his throat was ripped from his body with the speed of lightning.

    "Does anyone else question my judgement? Does anyone else actually think that" the Dracon asked his subserviants in the docking bay of the ship. Not one dared to answer.
    "Then to Noah VII, that is where our destiny lies."

    Finally, Duskvenom had the means to to usurp his master. It was his turn to take his rightful place as head of the Kabal, to take it from the void-born scum he knew his master was. To see the fear on his masters eyes. Take his life from him, the lone wanderer from Alaitoc, who, four thousand years ago just happened to wander into the Merciless City of Commorragh. The thought of taking his master's life was almost too much and Duskvenom started to cackle uncontrollably, so much so that he almost couldn't breath. He laughed like this for the rest of the trip from the Webway Gate to Noah VII.

    After making planetfall under an electrical storm, obviously caused by the arcane weapons of the Dark Eldar ships in low orbit, Duskvenom made a brief speech to the ones under his command.

    "Today, today we show everyone who are the true masters of this Galaxy. For too long, man has scoured the stars, thinking they have the right to rule. And our Craftworld cousins, hiding away in their shells and sailing along, depriving themselves of their true nature. Our true nature. We let them steal away our God, or what remains of him for themselves. And we let daemons, foul denizens of the warp, creatures that through only strength of will we can harness and enslave, take our rightful homeworld."

    "Not anymore, this Galaxy is ours. They only die in it."

    And with that, shumbling out of the crowd were four hooded Mon-Keigh, each holding a giant chest, made of wraithbone. They whispered words in the Dracons ear, and he nodded. Now knowing what words he needed to say as he opened the chest to bind the daemon to his will.

    "Zael'Mathas, it is I, your master who summons you. Now, obey my-"

    Every warrior, wych, and the two Haemonculi stared in shock. As the Dracon opened the chest, he was squirted with blue ink. The Daemonologists then unrobed to show that they weren't daemonologists at all, but three Callidus Assassins. Blinded, the Dracon had no chance against the multiple C'tan Phaseswords, one of which found its way through the throat of Duskvenom. Beheading Duskvenom in front of all his underlings.

    All the Dark Eldar could do was scramble when the chest that opened turn out to be a teleport homer. Within seconds, twelve grey knights arrived and effectively incinerated every last Eldar. There were no survivors. What made matters even worse was the fact that someone had recorded this entire massacre. And that someone felt that he was obliged to not only send this message to the Inquisitorial Conclave, but also to the Eldar Ambassadors of the For-Mor Craftworld.

    When the seers of For-Mor saw what had happened, they had found it utterly hilarious. And for the sake of sharing this laugh, they then sent this vid-pict to the Harlequins, who also found it hilarious. (Though, they find many things funny these days.) And so, for a few years, the denizens of the webway had no clue what happened to Chuculas Duskvenom or his raiding party, and at the same time none of them, not even his own Kabal payed much heed. Until the Harlequins came back to town.

    It was Blackflame's turn to host the Harlequin's troupe. And he thought that now was a great time to show the City his wealth and power. Blackflame held banquets that lasted for months, followed by the most amazing Gladiatorial Arenas where a captured Carnifex was pitted against an Ork Warboss. The fight was one that was very close, but due to the amazing resilience of the Ork, he was able to fell the Carnifex with a mighty swing of his Choppa. The crowd roared and jeered as the Ork put his arms up in victory, screaming a mighty Waaagh!!! However. The crowd was not cheering for him, but the elegant woman who strode into the arena. Her haired flowed all the way down her back until it was barely touching the floor. For the next hour and a half, the crowd watched in awe as the beauty slain the beast. At the end of the games, the arenas was quickly cleaned by the shambling Mon-Keigh, and then the Harlequins entered.

    Blackflame was missing from the festivities, not that he didn't enjoy bloodsport, but more that he never left his tower, not since he felled the Avatar. He did not enjoy the Dances of the Harlequins either, for the only reminded him that he is living in the death throes of his race. So without him, the show went on. However, before the show, the Troupe Master felt it proper to show to the people of Commorragh a vid-pict. The troupe then, showed the entire massacre of Dracon Duskvenom and his raiding party on Noah VII. Immediately, the most senior members of the Kabal left the arena.

    Rushing up to the top of the citadel, Sybarite Anduil stormed into Blackflame's corridors. As he walked through the doors, he was met with the tip of a Punisher. The Incubus looked back to Blackflame for a notion and he nodded, the sybarite knelt and did not dare star his master in the eye. Blackflame, not moving from his throne, sat there, like a giant statue, in full armor and it was minutes before he spoke.

    "I have already heard young Sybarite." A voice said, as if it were coming from everywhere, and nowhere at the same time. The voice surrounded the sybarite and seemed to be both tasting his soul, and threatening him.
    "My Lord," Anduil tremebled as he spoke, whether it was fear, or awe, he could not tell. "My Lord, all of Commorragh has seen this, what will you have us do?"

    There was a long pause before the Lord of the Kabal spoke. Anduil's eyes started to wander and he gazed upon Blackflame's trophies which hung upon the wall. Many Astartes Helms adorned the walls, and most of them adorned with laurels, wings, and the like. In the corner, gaurded by two Incubi there was a Haemonculus, busy at work apparently trying to forge some kind of armor for the Lord Blackflame. There were two banners behind the throne. One was Blackflame's family banner, which the Phoenix is born from the Black Flames of despair. And next to that was the Rune of the Kabal, which was a hybrid of the wanderer's rune and the rune of the dead. There was a giant sword, too big for any Eldar to hold. The sword was made of stone and iron, and upon looking at its ancient runes, Anduil felt hatred flow through him, bloodlust, and the need to destroy whoever shamed his master.

    The room shook, violently as Blackflame's eyes opened. His eyes were flaming red, and a large, white smile crept across his face. Finally, Black flame spoke. It seemed as though the entire tower shook when he spoke, and his voice came from everywhere yet nowhere.

    "I go to war."

    ;o

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  3. #2
    CKO
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    I like most of it, but the festival part left me confused as we went from grey knights killing everyone, to people viewing the death of the dracon to the festival. With better transition we can understand whats going on. The scenery of the room and the presence of black flame having power at the end was good.

  4. #3
    Thinks he's a big deal rafis117's Avatar
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    The Grey Knights wouldn't send Eldar a message. If they knew where the Eldar were, they would kill said witches.

    I LOVED it up till then. Like CKO said, that part was pretty confusing. Instead of the somewhat convoluted and psychedelic ending going on currently (presumably molded to the Dark Eldar, about whom you are writing), just say that Blackflame had a soulstone, bound to Dracon in order to communicate his orders, that suddenly turned off, and he sensed that it was a murder by the Grey Knights. That, for a drug-happy lord of a kabal of one of the most twisted an depraved forces in the known galaxy, would be due cause to start a war.
    Terminator armor going critical would be like Three Mile Island only very, VERY angry, and carrying a hammer.
    LO rules in a nutshell: Don't post unit costs, be polite, rep posts containing of win.

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    Thanks for the input guys. I haven't been able to work on the piece because I've been attacked by a boatful of school work.

    But yeah, I'll try to fix it up. What I was trying to get at was that the Ordo Malleus Inquisitor himself recorded the massacre with vid-picts attached to the assassins. He then sent vid-picts to Eldar Ambassadors, (who in the campaign is an Eldar player who has sided with the Imperium to fight off Chaos in the sector for the time being.) And the Eldar seers then sent it to Harlequins, and that is how the word got back to Commorragh.

    But yeah, I'll try to make it more clear once I get the time of day. And thanks again guys.
    ;o

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    Thinks he's a big deal rafis117's Avatar
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    Alright, this is starting to make more sense.

    However, the Ordo Malleus (literally "Order of the Hammer", basically Daemonhunters) are some of the most devout members of the Imperium and would NEVER send anything (except bolter rounds) to an Eldar.

    Imperial assassins also tend to have little or no personality or social skills, and follow orders merely because they are punished if they don't follow orders. They wouldn't receive any pride from it. The Officio Assassinatorium (who coordinate and assign assassins) might get the video as a proof-of-actions sort of thing, but not for personal satisfaction.

    Additionally, how did the Ordo Malleus get good footage of the event? Did they use tactical geniu- CREEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEED!

    /memes.

    The point is valid, memes or no memes. How would they get good footage of an event that they were teleporting to? Did they risk an unmanned object in the Warp? Did they carry it on them (and thus not get good footage)? Did one of the assassins plant it in the impromptu kill, taking a terrible risk to confirm something that nobody would doubt? Or did they plant it before-hand, instead of say, planting a bomb?
    Terminator armor going critical would be like Three Mile Island only very, VERY angry, and carrying a hammer.
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    I'm pretty familiar with the fluff, its just that my story does not correlate to it sadly.
    The Chest that the Dracon had obtained supposedly had a daemon in it. The Dracon wanted to bind the Daemon to himself to destroy the Archon. In order to do this, he managed to contact this Inquisitor to whom he was promised the Daemon to be bound to him through the Daemonologists (which were assassins) in return however, he would help to "liberate a certain planet from Imperial Rule." The Inquisitor himself however when he obtained the box, sent two convoys, one was a decoy, with a decoy chest, and the other had a decoy (which was the teleport homer.) The assassins, who were supposedly the Daemonologists then sprang. The only reason why the Ordo Malleus Inquisitor was attacking the Dark Eldar at the time is because he felt it was his obligation to destroy those who want to use the warp entity.


    The story is incredibly vague, and I'll try to get it redone hopefully by the end of the week. And thanks again for the feedback.
    ;o

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    CKO
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    Ok, gotcha now I know whats going on.

    Quote Originally Posted by rafis117 View Post
    However, the Ordo Malleus (literally "Order of the Hammer", basically Daemonhunters) are some of the most devout members of the Imperium and would NEVER send anything (except bolter rounds) to an Eldar.
    There are two types of Inquisitors purist and radicals, the radicals would communicate with Eldar.

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