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OK, I previously wrote a small short story about a Hive Tyrant and his experience in a siege, I will now attempt to do a short story about a broodlord and his routine of genestelers. here we go
The Mysetic Spore rocked violently as it penetrated the atmosphere of Vlagos II. Vlagos II is a somewhat large planet, it is a jungle planet that is currently controlled by the Imperial Guard. The goal was simple, to eradicate a commander of the imperial guard, for he knew extensive knowledge of how to stop the up-coming Tyranid invasion, the Hive Mind warping the creatures mind till it believed that this mission was what it was born to do.
The Spore crashed deep in the jungle, far enough away so there machines couldn't pick up any warning. As the spore pod opened, a long claw appeared, protruding from the opening, as it pushed, making the hole bigger it clambered out. Drawing its posture to its full, very impressive 2 and a half meter height. Two long scything talons at his side, with two massive claws, capable of ripping apart almost anything. The creatures senses kicked in, it glanced around, sniffing trying to locate its intended prey, as it looked around all it could see was a dense forest of trees, but it wasnt its vision it only used like the lesser creatures of the universe. It smelt a slight hint of cooking meat, and cheap whiskey. As it completed its first expect ion the rest of his squad emerged. 12 of the most vicious creatures you could find in this galaxy, all hovering by his side, waiting for his commands. The creature was to far away from the mind it receive direct orders, instead it used its own initiative to complete the task set by the mind. With a low hiss the squad set off at a sprint, not a sound being made, like ghosts in a forest.
The creature stopped mid stride, not making a sound, an art he mastered of hundreds of different lives. the other creatures stopped around him. The creature could now see a small stone building in a cleared area of trees, it could sense the guardsman laughing, having a good time. But there was something not right, something not in place. There was something else that lurked these shadows, with the grace that matched his own. From the corner of his eye he saw it, just for a second, but he knew it was there. Another race in green armor, they blended into the trees, almost invisible. With a second of thinking the routine split into two, the broodlord and three stealers double backed whilst the rest stay moved closer to the guardsman.
The broodlord could now see his would-be assasins. Eldar striking scorpions. He has meet his death many times by these masters of combat, but not this time, now he had the upper hand. He had the suprise, he and his squad moved closer up behind them, the creatured raised its massive claw and started to bring it down on them-but suddenly it stopped, it ducked, no-one could explain how it knew to do this, thousands of hours in jungles and all types of terrain have taught the creature how to know when something is right or wrong, just as it ducked a bullet flew through the air, embedding itself in a tree directly in front of him. The scorpions were up in a blink, there chainswords swinging in large arcs, each stealer took two on at a time, the broodlord took on four: duck- duck, slash, slash, avoid, it kept repeating this cycle, it moved whit blistering speed, as one of the scorpions went to raise its hand to bring down his sword, the broodlord caught his wrist, wrapping his large hands around it, with a flick of one of its claws it snapped it, sending the scorpion to the ground in pain, raising its massive leg is used all its might and stepped on the scorpions helmet, sending its neck to snap, as the broodlord looked at the three other scorpions the all were now in a defensive stance, it leaped forward, wrapping its arms around ones neck, snapping anothers neck, with a kick to the thigh one of the scorpions ducked in pain, and the creature lifted its knee sending the scorpion flying. And then there was one, this one was different, it was more experienced like an Exarch. The danced the dance of death, avoiding one another and swinging wildly, when a roar come form behind him, he knew the other genestealers had killed those pesky things who shot at him before. As the exarch swung at him, he grabbed the wrist, pointing his sword to the ground and his elbow up toward the sky, with a massive thrust, straight into the elbow, it snapped, sending the exarch to the floor with pain, it was a quick death. With in a second the retinue was back together, the imperial guard were all within the walls with bolters pointed at the woods.
With a massive roar that shook all the trees in the near by area the squad ran out, bracing the incoming fire, with a massive leap the broodlord was over the walls, hacking its way through till it found its prey, the commander of this squad, he had extensive knowledge of how to beat this new threat of the Tyranids, with a massive jump and a slice with his scything talons, the threat was no more.
Death is moving closer towards the imperium, its name is Hive Fleet Macabre.
Yeh, any advice on how I could improve would be good next I may take an attempt at writing a story about a ripper Thanks
Last edited by Hive Fleet Macarbe; May 25th, 2010 at 12:01.
Whilst i like the story, it really dosnt fit the role of a broodlord. Assasination of key firgures is very definatly a lictor role, not something genestealers would do.
Also you keep saying that the broodlord had lived many lives, but thats only for Hive Tyrants and possibly dominatrixes. Broodlords arnt worth recycling to that extent.
But good story, well done.
Your friendly neighbourhood gargantuan creature
Dam :/. Ok.. hmm.. thanks for the advice next time ill try to improve it
Erm yh assasination i would leave that to lictors. - That would be a good wee story for you much better then a wee schemey ripper rat.
Thought your fluff was very good tho. Can i have a link to your Hive Tyrant fluff?