So recently I`ve been more and more tempted to try Orks and so I decided to try my hand and trying to do some fluff for said army, The basic idea for the TlR`s out there is a Ork hulk crashes on Catachan and after a luck accident the Orks wind up being led by a basic trooper and now they fight for the emperor.
I know the ending is quite rushed but I`ll be honest I was staring to run out ideas and the best way to put it into words so my apologies on that front.


Da Emperors ferst Catachan Green-skins

Catachan is well known for many things but its most infamous claim to fame is the fact that not only is it quite possibly the most deadly planet in the Imperium it’s also the home to the renowned Imperial Guard regiment known as the “Catachan Jungle fighters”. What’s not quite as well known is that it’s also home to what could be the only Imperium loyal warband of Orks who were once named “Grimrotz gobblerz” But now go by the name of “Da Emperors ferst Catachan Greenskins” to know why such an unruly species became loyal to the Emperor requires us to delve twenty years into history and the luck of one normal guardsman.

A small outpost far from the beaten track had noticed a Ork hulk had crashed some distance from their outpost, So the outpost commander sent out a squad to investigate the hulk and deal with any Orks that maybe on board the hulk or any other xenos that may have been lingering on board. One of the unsuspecting squad members was a large man even by the standards of the Catachans and a speech impediment that left people having to ask him to repeat himself quite a bit, whose name was “John Stone” and he alone would instigate the most bizarre sight for quite some time by complete accident.

As the squad proceeded through the jungle towards the reported landing site John’s squad somehow whether by sheer bad luck or just sheer stupidity stumbled across and woke a slumbering Catachan Devil who proceeded to start tearing the squad apart in a whirlwind of slaughter and violence. Once the shock of the sudden frenzy wore off the guardsmen started trying to fell the creature with their weapons but the lasguns just bounced off of the creatures thick hide, John had managed to set up his Heavy bolter but his aim was so dreadful even against such a monstrous creature he almost mowed down his own squad mates. As the Sergeant was torn in two by the Devils vast claws the squads already shocked morale broke and what remained of the squad tried to flee.

While most of them were quickly devoured or destroyed by the chasing devil John ran for his life with little care for direction or in truth any of his former comrades safety. Multiple times he fell over and found himself rolling down banks and into muddy pools. He couldn’t honestly know how long he’d run for but he kept running until his lungs felt like they were about to explode.

John continued to stumble through the under growth until he found a small river that flowed into what looked like a large clearing so with thoughts of trying to make contact with the other squads and make some food and get some more water he headed into the clearing only to find himself confronted with the very Ork hulk he and his squad had been sent to investigate.

If you asked John why the Orks paused from killing him even he wouldn’t know why, the truth could only be seen from the Orks themselves as they saw what could only be another Ork from the way he was covered in mud and grass they immediately took him for a survivor of the crash. A survivor who decided he should be the new War Boss as he immediately launched himself at War Boss Grimrot.

John thought that if he was going to face death he’d take the biggest green skin as possible with him and indeed he saw a huge Ork dressed in the most flamboyant but ill fitting clothes imaginable. As John charged he unleashed a war-cry, pulled clear his combat knife and lunged at the Ork who barely got his Power Klaw in line to parry the blow. Grimrot laughed and Said “ Look ere boys a Ork oo`s got more guts than the lot of you bilge rats” with this he swung his Klaw back at John who being slightly more agile than the Boss ducked under the clumsy swing and dragged his blade across Grimrot`s under arm spilling dark blood whilst this wasn’t a mortal wound it did take Grimrot`s Power Klaw out of the fight which aided John greatly but made the Ork no less of a dangerous opponent. Grimrot lashed out with a vicious kick that John on the jaw sending him flying backwards to land in the pool of water and smashing his jaw. As Grimrot advanced he slipped on a loose patch of rock and fell down next to John who was quick to make advantage of this lucky break and drove his blade into the back of Grimrot`s skull. Amazingly Grimrot Stood up and plucked the knife from the back of his skull pulling with it his somewhat under used Brain. With a look of comical curiosity and the final words of “Dat`s not supposed to be dere!” Grimrot tumbled over dead

John stood back immediately ready for the onslaught of the remaining Orks, but rather than attack they almost seemed confused and thumped their arms across their chests, almost as if they were submitting to this new War-boss, John was both amazed and confused by this behaviour. Curious as to what this could mean he shouted in barely passable English due to his shattered jaw “Atten`shun!” and he himself stood to attention and saluted. Again to his amazement the Orks tried to copy his movements down to straightening up and trying to salute him.

Knowing he didn’t have enough provisions to make it back to his barracks he decided to make the best of a bad situation and “Ordered” his new squad to collect food, Thanks to his major speech impediment and having a smashed jaw the Orks basically followed his orders mistaking his voice for one of his own, But where they saw him as a Ork they collected Orky food which was basically Fungi although it tasted foul John found it was edible and kept him alive. When the Orks weren’t collecting food John made them perform basic Imperial Guard training and military formations John eventually started to enjoy being around the Orks and had a strange idea of what might happen if he was able to introduce this bizarre group of Orks to the doctrines of the Imperium and the Imperial Guard army.

As such he finally took it upon himself to take the risk and wash after so many weeks living in filth and muck. The Orks barely paid any attention to this newly clean “Ork”. He then gathered the food gathered by the Orks and ordered the Orks to form up in single line and get ready for the march to their new camp and so the Orks gathered their belongings and set off for the very same outpost that Johns unit had set off from barely weeks earlier.

And so a few weeks later Johns mob approached a very well armed and indeed heavily manned outpost who had received word that a Large mob was making its way to the outpost needless to say that when they got the visual of John at the head of this mob, Orders were hastily given to hold fire until this bizarre scene could be understood. In next to record time The outposts Veteran squad were covering the Orks whilst their Commissar and Company commander walked up to the man who had not only was thought to be dead but had indeed brought a mob of Orks willingly to their outpost. John saluted them as they approached him and almost instantly the Orks did so too along with multiple shouts of “For der Emperer” making the Veterans almost start firing just out of shock.John willingly surrendered himself and the unit he called “The Emperors first Catachan greenskins” and after much misunderstanding and many repetitions due to Johns now irreversibly smashed jaw and against their better judgement they decided to let John carry on being the sergeant of this unorthodox mob/ unit