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Started writing this yesterday, and kept getting ideas. I haven't seen the new codex yet, so don't flip out on me if its not to the new dex's standards. Only thing in this that relates to my models is the painting Black on the Deathwing models (I didn't like that plains world thing) and the model for my hero. This is the first part of my story, not sure how much is left.
Shells around me, piling into mounds of heated casings. A bronze wall growing in size as the bolts fly. It’s past my waist now, the extended fire fight adding more and more foes to the death toll. These tyranids stand no chance to the will of the Dark Angels. This fort must hold against the waves of the gaunts flowing in. It has been three days the devastators of the 9th company were stationed at Fortunate’s Keep. Ironic, as this would become a center of bad luck focused on the 8 squads defending it . No peace for this defense force, as any marine knows that the swarms of gaunts are only the calm before the storm.
Five months Prior
Silence. In the chapel of the Lion’s Blade that is all I can find. But I am not alone. For in front of me lay a black shard of what is believed to have once been part of the Lion’s gauntlet. Chaplains say that it was obtained during the first duel between El’Jonson and Russ, broken from the armored glove of our chapters Primarch’s due to the final blow dealt. At least this is what the Chaplains tell us. How or why the fight occurred has been blurred over the centuries, but I prefer our chapters beliefs. True or not, the validity of the sacred artifact is proven. In the corner of my eye I notice the subtle movements of one of them. Chaplain Ikarius calls them the Lion’s Guard, our chapters protectors of our most holy relics. Tiny robed familiars associated with our chapter, always watching from the darkness. I come to the chapel to find solitude, not prying eyes. They disturb me.
“Sergeant Darheus to flight deck.” My helmet lay on the floor near me, a message buzzing through the static of my vox unit. I had turned off the local channel so nearby squads performing their daily rites of combat would not disturb my meditation. This must be of some importance, as few marines had the authority to override a vox lock. I signal my acknowledgement while securing the last few locking mechanisms on the helm. “Sergeant Darheus, you are to assemble your squad and proceed to the flight deck. From there you shall take thunder hawk IV to the Devastation and wait for further orders.”
Standing before me was squad Darheus, gleaming in their recently repaired and re-sanctified dark green armor. I paced back and forth in my black armor inspecting my brothers, my white robes rustling as they dragged across the deck. Only 6 men were remaining after the last engagement at Hurroneus, the loss of 4 soldiers was not an easy one to recover from. Squad members Malifius and Gabriel formed the close support with their bolters. Of the remaining specialists were Saphial, armed with a war torn lascannon, Behlial with his missile launcher, and our newest member Caluin, toting the chapters ancient yet still powerful plasma cannon. I once held that same cannon in my earlier days of service, but that was before I learned the truth and joined Deathwing. Once everything was in check we boarded the transport and made way for the Devastation.
A battle barge is a rare sight to those not of the Astartes, but even I had trouble withholding my awe at the its latent potential. The bombardment cannons alone could demolish cruisers and cripple even the mightiest of capital ships. As the servitor pilot guided us into the hangar I could see my squad were not the only ones called in. Nearly half a dozen transports were unloading their troops and armored support. Upon landing all squads were redirected to the tactician halls for briefings. Once there I couldn’t help but notice that all seven squads present were lead by a marine in the same menacing black armor and faded white robe attire I wore to battle. Why was each squad in this task force a member of Deathwing? Walking through the congregation I see many brothers I have fought beside in previous battles. Brother Zerium of the tactical squad five from 4th company was giving a thorough inspection of a recently inducted brother’s flame thrower. Of the squads there two men moved indiscriminately through the crowd, with no squad they belonged to. First was Ramiel, a member of the Astartes Mechanicus. I knew him well as he was assigned to the 9th company to perform reparations on the squads heavy weaponry. The other was a man I had never seen before. He was smaller than an average marine, only coming up to my neck in height. His armor was white, but his hooded robe was black. On one gauntlet there was an attached chainsword and injectors. An apothecary who was also of Deathwing? This was rare indeed, as few apothecaries who reach such a high position were never seen on the field of battle.
The final squad came in from the far side of the auditorium, meaning this squad was already onboard and ready. Eight men clad in black marched in with jump packs disguised as wings strapped to their backs. Each was ready for a fight with bolt pistols drawn and hand sickles raised to their chest in salute. They formed 2 rows from that entrance to the stone alter. From the dark archway strode in Interrogator-Chaplain Styphus. Each heavy footstep became louder as he drew closer, his blackened green cloak’s drag filling in the moments between stomps. A sharp clack ringed as the black scythe’s wooden end struck the floor. To complete the symphony, the flutter of wings. One of the chapters few remaining models, a pair of angelic wings were grafted to his back, jutting from the shoulders of his black artifacer suit. They were constructed during the Dark Age of Technology, and not even our greatest of tech-marines could comprehend how they were powered or could manage to keep a fully armored marine aloft during battle.
He paused at the alter, his black ceramite fingers gripping around the stone edge, peering through the red eyes of his skull helmet. Only once had I seen him this close before, and that was when I was inducted to the first company. “Brothers!” he boomed, “We have reports of a massive Tyranid splinter fleet heading towards Olivion Secondus, a Terra class moon located on the border between Tempest and Ultima Segmentum. It is on this moon there is Fortunate’s Keep. It is one of ours, built millenia ago during the Great Crusade. The keep itself will be lost, but it is not our primary objective. We are to send a sizable force there under my command to evacuate as many survivors as possible. We will head begin heading there with a fleet of four Gladius class escorts, and strike cruiser Metatron. Two squads for each ship, and the cruiser will go for our evacuees, and for support should a situation arise. Each squad leader is to report to the chapel in ten minutes for ship assignments and squad duties. May the Lion Protect.” “Why must we be sent to assist in a situation that can be contained by local Imperial Navy?” questioned Caluin. “Do not question our chapters motives. You will do as your superiors say.” Although insulent he was right, for I wondered that exact question.
The chapel halls were astonishing. On the left, the walls were carved to show some of the great accomplishments of our primarch, and the right with the Emperor. Each scene had a candle at its base, creating a dark gothic atmosphere. Even my auto senses had trouble focusing of the other members of Deathwing gathered. All I could make out were six other eye lenses glowing blood red, and lights on power packs showing energy levels. Suddenly and without warning something crashed to the floor from above. A faint glow started to spread, each a fazzy blue shade in the shape of feathers. Its head rose and the red haze coming from his eye lenses only illuminating the edges oh his hood. It was Styphus, looking like an angel of death in the grim darkness. Tiny robed figures strode up carrying his crozius scythe, the blade a sharpened piece of black obsidian. I stood in awe as my brother Interrogator took his slow steps past the sergeants, leaving a glowing azure trail in his wake.
“This mission’s importance exceeds all of your lives.” I had always wondered how the chaplains could enhance their vox audio output. It made every word a dire and important. “You should all be wondering why the chapter would send their marines to do such a wasted task. Only one man there is of any importance. One of those former brothers who have fallen from the chapters grace. We know not this traitor’s name, we only know he has taken control of the keep and swayed the people living in it to his side. It is from that we suspect he was of a higher rank before the loss of Caliban. We must capture and secure him before leaving. His survival is your highest priority. For the main portion of the mission sergeants will be separated from their squad to accomplish our set task. Expect the followers of the fallen marine to attack us, and of course the tyranid thread. Oblivion Secondus has only suffered the beginning of the invasion, with spores clouding the skys and infrequent genestealer attacks. We will be flown down by means of thunder hawk ships into the courtyard, two squads per transport, and two more will be brought in for a few survivors to keep the appearance of a rescue mission. The keep itself is set against a cliff, so only the westernmost side will be faced with the tyranid invasion. Brother Loran, you and your terminators will stay aboard the Metatron and teleport in once we have the force situated. Oracus’ tactical squad shall situate on the fortress’ walls on the northwest ledge. It is here that we expect the least activity but need to make sure no xenos breach. Squads Crispin and Darheus will take position on the walls above the gate, with Crispin’s right above to make better use of the squads heavy bolters. Everyone else shall wait in the courtyard, protecting the thunder hawks should the tyranid threat break through. The only armored support we are getting for this mission is one of 10th companies few land raiders of a crusader pattern. Once the troops are in place all members of Deathwing shall rendezvous with my honor guard on the eastern side of the yard. Now go brothers, and prepare your squad. We have five months time before we reach the target, leaving you plenty of time to train with your men. Through purity we pray the Emperor forgive us.”
Last edited by Jaffar_Hasad; March 14th, 2007 at 01:32. Reason: Mixups
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I guess the first thing that struck me about this fine piece of fluffy fluff was the point of view from which it's written ^^ It's good stuff, and the first one I've read that's from a first-person view.
It makes the whole deal a lot more refreshing. Also - I found it funny how he wonders about the Chaplain increasing his Vox-Caster's output haha. Funny stuff, little over-zealous bastards.
AAaaaanyway, hope you don't get put off from the fact that not a lot of people are commenting on fluff lately - but there's always a small group who gets to it as soon as they get a chance so don't ya worry about more professional feedback.
I'm sure Imperialis and Lyran will get on you for the Fluffy references (since I'm not a Fluffmeister) - all I can say is keep it commin'!
I was a little confused about the first part about all the bolter casings flying everywhere and a wall of bronze and something about it coming um to his waist. Is he saying that the bolter shells are piled so high that they are coming up to his waist? If so I would change this as there is no way they have that much ammunition and in real warefare casings are swept away from machine guns and such (or they have a bag that the shells fly in).
Also, I know it is not fluffy as such, but try to make the beginning a little more... hopeless. There is too much Space Marine fluff about how much ass they kick etc etc. To quote someone (I forgot their name) from the rules of a fluff competition:Man that was funny... anyway maybe add a twist to the story about the Tyranids becoming more and more dangerous to them when they go to that outpost to get the fallen guy.Originally Posted by some guy from LO, I can't remember his name
And also, I don't think regular members of the deathwing know about the fallen secret, just members of the inner circle (specifically chaplains, librarians, company masters, and Grand Masters, including from successor chapters). Maybe techmarines, I don't know for sure though.
One of the things changed in the new codex is clarification of who is in the Deathwing. In the old codex, company masters were members of the deathwing and therefore stubborn but now the inner circle and deathwing are completely separate.
Otherwise it's pretty nice, I myself prefer to write first person 40k stories (I have one about a Vindicare assassin waiting for days for his target).
Adahn:The point of view will change between story parts. It will include views from A)Loren Caluin (iffy on this one) C)Mystery Apothecary D)Styphus himself (He will not be standing atop a pile of Nids, he'll be ripping the fallen's minions to shreds, then end with [spoiler goes here])
Ezekielid I not state that gaunts are a calm before a storm? This nid fleet will be the one I've wanted to make based on ravenors. Everything is serpentine so ravenors poping up in couryards, CC out the butt, and my idea for a Carni breed (ooh boy can't wait to write about that bad boy).
I also said it would be bad luck. Notice how some characters are named after LO users? Yeah so far I've come up with 1 decent idea for a death (but the user didn't enjoy it).
Quick fluff related question: Were there Librarians running around in Horus Heresy times? I want to make the Fallen one a psycher for a good idea I have brewing.
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To your question: Yes, they were. Ahriman was the Chief Librarian of the Thousand Sons in the Great Crusade. Therefore it follows that there were Librarians.
To the fluff: Nice, I like it. Though the Great Crusade was millenia ago, not centuries...
"It is one of ours, built centuries ago during the Great Crusade."
That's all for now...
Oh crap. I mixed 100 years and 1,000? years? Thanks for the reminder, and for the librarian thing I was just wondering is it was Thousand Son only. Thanks Imperialis_Dominatus
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