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  1. #1
    Senior Member Lyzaru's Avatar
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    Fluff for my GK special character

    I am not sure if this is were I post this kind of stuff or if I followed all the rules. ( hope I read it all ).

    Ok me and my friends sometimes play using our own special characters and I just wanted to see what you guys on LO thought of my special character and his fluff. ( since I havent read a lot of the existing fluff I didnt want to give any names to the planet and stuff yet nor do I know if a story like this already exists ) Any comments are welcome.

    - fluff =
    As their ship neared the tainted planted, the grey knights prepared themselves to be teleported into the ruins. They had to stop the chaos sorcerer before he could finish his ritual. –

    Justicar Lyzaru finishes blessing his nemesis force weapon and grabs his storm bolter as he raises his head to look at his battle brothers. He then steps into the teleporter, knowing no words need be said.

    They arrive on the massive staircase of the ruins leading to the main building but before they can even take a step, pale skinned daemons swarm towards them as piercing screams fill the air. As the daemons leap in on the grey knights they are engulfed in a giant blaze of fire. Lyzaru tightly grips his weapon and charges up the stairs as his brethren hold off the horde. More daemons run towards him, his blade gliding through their flesh, as their talons bounce off his armor.

    As he reaches the entrance a bolt of energy shoots out, narrowly missing him as he charges forward. The sorcerer turns to face him, they clash weapons and Lyzaru gets knocked to the ground but before the sorcerer can finish him off his battle brethren Dante parries the sorcerer’s blow. As Lyzaru leaps to his feet he gets sprayed in blood as Dante gets cleaved in two, he lunges forward and this time his blade finds its target piercing through the sorcerer’s armor and into his chest. As Lyzaru pulls his blade out, the sorcerer falls to his knees laughing his last breath.

    Lyzaru looks up to see an orb crackling with power. As he walks over towards it a huge burst of dark light pulses out of it. Fearing it might be activating he rushes forward striking it with his weapon, it explodes sending him flying into the wall. As he falls to his knees he looks down to see a dark substance oozing over his armor and then he sees only darkness.

    He awakes in a void of darkness unable to move he tries to discern where he is at but is unable too. He begins to hear numerous voices in his head taunting him with every desire he could ever want, but he knows all to well the tricks of chaos and begins to silence them from his mind one at a time.

    As he silences the last one he feels a cold grip him. His eyes open on the ruins he was in before. He looks down to see his body ghost out of the wall it appears as if his body is not stable in this realm as it ripples and shimmers. Yet he feels stronger and sees everything more clearly then he did before almost as if he knows what is happening before hand. As he steps outside everything has decayed since he last saw it, for it has been more then 500 years since he last layed his eyes upon it.


    - play stats =
    WS=6 BS=5 S=5 T=5 W=2 I=6 A=4 LD=10 SV=3+/4+ Pts=235
    wargear = fist of the void ( counts as a master crafted power fist that strikes at I instead of last) , void armor ( power armor with a 4+ invulnerable save ), ccw, frags
    pysker powers = veil of time, holocaust ( Lyzaru doesnt need to make a test to use a power )

    special =
    - displacement = upon returning from the void generated when his nemesis force weapon struck the daemonic artifact. His body became charged from the energy that was released, this causes him to appear in a rippled affect. ( models attacking him in close combat always require a 5+ to hit )
    - fleet of foot = ( may use the fleet special rule )
    - aura of the void = a blinding darkness surrounds him in a 9" radius preventing those from the outside of seeing in ( units outside may not target units within nor may they draw line of sight through it ). Daemons may not enter play within the radius and must make an instibility test at the start of each assault phase if any models of the unit are inside the radius. Any psykers within the radius will suffer a perlis of the warp any time they use a pychic power, as if they had rolled two 1s / 6s ( still roll to see if they successfully use the power or not )( this does not affect Lyzaru ).
    - fearless = Lyzaru benefits from the fearless special rule.
    - overwhelming power = due to his time spent in the void, his mental powers have increased so much that he must take time to focus his mind or he may die. Lyzaru must spend the first turn doing nothing, this means he may not move, shoot or assault ( even if he is assaulted he may not fight ), If ever he is killed everything within the aura of the void suffers a S10 automatic hit with no armor saves allowed. ( you may choose to have Lyzaru act on turn 1 of the game but if you do he will suffer an automatic wound at the end of turn 2, 4, 6 and so on with no armor save allowed, he may still make an invulnerable save )
    - sacred mind = Lyzaru may not be affected by pychic powers and is immune to all instant death and kill effects.
    - total purity = If Lyzaru is taken you may only take grey knights, grey knight terminators, grey knight dreadnoughts, grey knight landraiders + crusaders, and orbital strikes.

    EDIT: Please read my later posts and the updated play rules and if you didnt read the fluff do so before you leave comments on how to change him. Thanks.

    Last edited by Lyzaru; June 25th, 2007 at 19:42.
    - You must set fire to water or you will be extinguished.

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  3. #2
    gunslut pookakitty's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lyzaru View Post
    - total purity = If Lyzaru is taken you may only take grey knights, grey knight terminators, grey knight dreadnoughts, grey knight landraiders + crusaders, and orbital strikes.
    must you take all of these to have him?

    and he seems far too cheap at 235pts for all those powerful abilities. he's a CC monster who has an inbuilt inability to be taken out by ranged attacks

    in fact i think he's the most powerful SC I've seen
    Last edited by pookakitty; June 23rd, 2007 at 09:28.

  4. #3
    Senior Member harlequin2262's Avatar
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    Double his price, minimum. Barring the mount, he's almost as good as Acheron.

  5. #4
    Senior Member Lyzaru's Avatar
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    you dont have to take all of them to use him pookakitty buy you can only use those units if you take him ( so you couldnt take him if are taking inquisitors, or if you are taking allies / basically you have to have a pure grey knight army )

    as for points I havent used him yet so he still neededs to be play tested and I will adjust him as needing no big deal ( when I first made him he was a 340 points but I thought that was really high since he only has 2 wounds, but I guess we will see as me and my friends are playing this sunday ).

    he can however be shot at just you have to be within the aura ( which you would generally have to do to shoot an IC anyway, and it blocks LOS for everyone not just my opponent. The only way you can shoot is if you are inside firing out, or inside firing inside. )

    And just wondering what you guys though of the fluff since it is my first time and I would like to get better at it. ( I know I still have a lot of existing fluff to read and that should help too )
    - You must set fire to water or you will be extinguished.

  6. #5
    Senior Member Lyzaru's Avatar
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    you dont have to take all of them to use him pookakitty but you can only use those units if you take him ( so you couldnt take him if are taking inquisitors, or if you are taking allies / basically you have to have a pure grey knight army )

    as for points I havent used him yet so he still needs to be play tested and I will adjust him as needed no big deal ( when I first made him he was a 340 points but I thought that was really high since he only has 2 wounds, but I guess we will see as me and my friends are playing this sunday ).

    he can however be shot at just you have to be within the aura ( which you would generally have to do to shoot an IC anyway, and it blocks LOS for everyone not just my opponent. The only way you can shoot is if you are inside firing out, or inside firing inside. )

    And just wondering what you guys though of the fluff since it is my first time and I would like to get better at it. ( I know I still have a lot of existing fluff to read and that should help too )
    - You must set fire to water or you will be extinguished.

  7. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lyzaru View Post

    - play stats =
    WS=6 BS=5 S=5 T=5 W=2 I=6 A=4 LD=10 SV=3+/4+ Pts=235
    He's a space marine. Even Grey Knights are space marines. There's no reason he should have strength and toughness five. He's not a primarch nor a monstrous creature.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lyzaru View Post
    wargear = fist of the void ( counts as a master crafted power fist that strikes at I instead of last) , void armor ( power armor with a 4+ invulnerable save ), ccw, frags
    pysker powers = veil of time, holocaust ( Lyzaru doesnt need to make a test to use a power )
    More than five strength ten powerattacks at genestealer initiative is, frankly, insane. There's a reason powerfists strike at last initiative. Lower both his initiative and return the powerfist to striking last. You may just wish to give him terminator armor instead of the void armor.

    Quote Originally Posted by Lyzaru View Post
    special =
    - displacement = upon returning from the void generated when his nemesis force weapon struck the daemonic artifact. His body became charged from the energy that was released, this causes him to appear in a rippled affect. ( models attacking him in close combat always require a 5+ to hit )
    Way, way overpowered.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lyzaru View Post
    - fleet of foot = ( may use the fleet special rule )
    No. No, no, no. No person EVER has fleet of foot in power armor except Karandras as he is an eldar, but since not even striking scorpions can do it in a race described as probably the most graceful in the galaxy...no.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lyzaru View Post
    - aura of the void = a blinding darkness surrounds him in a 9" radius preventing those from the outside of seeing in ( units outside may not target units within nor may they draw line of sight through it ). Daemons may not enter play within the radius and must make an instibility test at the start of each assault phase if any models of the unit are inside the radius. Any psykers within the radius will suffer a perlis of the warp any time they use a pychic power, as if they had rolled two 1s / 6s ( still roll to see if they successfully use the power or not )( this does not affect Lyzaru ).
    I'd amend this to work like psychic hood.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lyzaru View Post
    - fearless = Lyzaru benefits from the fearless special rule.
    Fair enough.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lyzaru View Post
    - overwhelming power = due to his time spent in the void, his mental powers have increased so much that he must take time to focus his mind or he may die. Lyzaru must spend the first turn doing nothing, this means he may not move, shoot or assault ( even if he is assaulted he may not fight ), If ever he is killed everything within the aura of the void suffers a S10 automatic hit with no armor saves allowed. ( you may choose to have Lyzaru act on turn 1 of the game but if you do he will suffer an automatic wound at the end of turn 2, 4, 6 and so on with no armor save allowed, he may still make an invulnerable save )
    Basically, this sounds like you'll want to encourage people to run him up and have him die to, basically, kill everything in a nine inch radius. I suggest you ammend this rule.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lyzaru View Post
    - sacred mind = Lyzaru may not be affected by pychic powers and is immune to all instant death and kill effects.
    Change this as well. There's not reason that he shouldn't be affected by other psyker powers. Also, change it to the point where he's immune to instant death (as per iron halo, I believe is called). The way you're wording it makes it seem like he'd be immune to force weapons and wraithguard cannons.
    Quote Originally Posted by Lyzaru View Post
    - total purity = If Lyzaru is taken you may only take grey knights, grey knight terminators, grey knight dreadnoughts, grey knight landraiders + crusaders, and orbital strikes.
    Why? Does he not like the Inquisition? Well, that's a little tough considering the GKs and the DH are so intertwined that they're nigh inseperable.

    I suggest you go read the believable special character thread. You seem to want to make the character the best at everything. He has some of the best initiative in the game, he has the strongest possible attacks in the game, your whole "immune to psychic powers" thing is pretty strange.
    "Tell me what you cherish most. Give me the pleasure of taking it away." Sephiroth, Final Fantasy VII: Advent Children

  8. #7
    Senior Member Lyzaru's Avatar
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    ok one I dont know why my last post went up twice

    second I only posted his stats incase anyone wanted to know as I only use him when me and my group of good friend all use our own heroes/hqs

    third he is not the best at everything as he can not shoot at all, he is str / tough five cause the artifact altered his body when it entered through his wounds when he destoryed it ( somewhat like how chaos/warp alters marines )

    overwhelming power should say may only glance AVs just forgot to put it, sorry about that.

    I didnt mean to have it sound like he is immune to wraith cannon / force weapons although since he is immune to psychic powers that may prevent force weapons as they need a test but dont know how that would rule out, and to be immune is not overpowered as DH have an item that does it called the null rod.

    how is init 6 overpowered as SM characters can get ( lib w/ familiar and I assume they have a way to get furious charge, also dark eldar / eldar can get 6+ as can daemon princes )

    his armor is not really power armor just said that as it grants a 3+ armor save

    I am very aware that he point cost may need to be increased but as I said before I have yet to play test it.
    Last edited by Lyzaru; June 24th, 2007 at 09:43.
    - You must set fire to water or you will be extinguished.

  9. #8
    Member Kirus's Avatar
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    Even though this is your own personal, just for friends character, and will never see the light of tournie day or any sanctioned competition, short of a painting demo, his fluff is nice, his equipment is cool, but the dude is practically divine.

    Why not give him the "Smite Mortals" power or give him the unique ability "Punish the Sinners"?

    I mean...come on.

    I would hope he needs a point prerequisite of at least 2500 with those stats.

    But as I said, he's yours, and he's pretty cool.

  10. #9
    Senior Member Lyzaru's Avatar
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    Well we dont have a set base but when we play we tend to do 2000-2750 so it would be close to that when I use him. ( think he is bad, I have seen some people make special characters that are like the uber bloodthrister daemon only like half the cost or one guy who had S8 force weapon on a T6 with a banshee mask effect and he thought that was fair at like 150 points ( I atleast play test mine and adjust the points to suit the abilities )

    after testing mine earlier I have found like 310 to be pretty fair ( although have only done 2 test games so far so may alter a little bit more )

    Thanks kirus though for actually commenting on the fluff as that is what I was looking for and he was fun as hell to convert / paint
    Last edited by Lyzaru; June 25th, 2007 at 19:51.
    - You must set fire to water or you will be extinguished.

  11. #10
    is Alpharius FabricatorGeneralMike's Avatar
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    Fluffwise I love him. He really fits the theme of the GK's. He uber which is approperate as the GK's are the Uber SpaceMarines. He is a well thought out fluff charactor.

    As for gamebalance, the way 40k is going now....they moved away from the uber leeto pwnz all charactors when 3rd edition came out. Maybe you should post him in the rule development section and see what other people have to say there. :ninja:

    And if you ever get board of playing the GK's and the 'good guys' im shure the dark gods could use some new deciples :shifty:
    FluffMaster on a mission to turn people to the Sisters of battle, yes folks it's all about SoB squads in Repressors with lots of flamer templates for the win.

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