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(This is fluff I created for a roughly 2000 point VC army I'm working on. I just wanted to get all your opinions.)
There are dark places in the twisting drakwald woods where even the beasts and greenskins do not wander. Through their generations and primitive story telling, they have passed the legend of Drakwald Tower, and the demon that resides within. They spin tales of a bare plain amidst the wood where a massive tower of granite stands. It has no windows and a single door large enough for five ogres to walk through. This is the home of Lord Evistur the Deranged.
An ancient vampire of W'soran's line, his tower lies upon a fixed point of dark magic, where he spends his days in his great study. Like many of his kin, he is a disgusting creature, caring not for the confides of appearance. His life has been a studious one and the power of mortal wizards, man, elf, or greenskin, pails in comparison to his. He is a spiteful creature, and when forced from his studies and onto the battlefield he is filled with immense hate for all. In battle he rides atop a hellsteed of most foul appearance, having bought the fresh corpse of a dark pegasus while traveling abroad. He wears powerful armour that's foul magic protect him from most harm and wields a destructive lance carved from a tree possessed by an ancient demon of fire. Finally, as he fell beast wings him across the field of battle he utters dark words from his own copy of Arkhan's infamous tome.
As loath as he is to do so, Evistur has two students under his tutelage. The first is the vampire formally known by men as Karl von Luthran. For 500 years Luthran has served his master, becoming a fairly powerful entity in his own right. Wielding an enchanted blade from his days as a nobleman, he can carve through stone, while his bloodied hauberk can resist blows of equal measure. The junior of the apprentices is the stinking Itshaf Strone. Serving Evistur for a more meager 40 years, he has surprising skill in writing scrolls which deny the magic of his lord's enemies. This foul man also has another surprising gift, which has kept him from his master's wrath thus far. He was somehow able to bind one of the legendary Corpse Carts to his will, and drives it with a horrible cackle in battle.
Forming the bulk of Evistur's force is three regiments of skeleton warriors, collected over the years from foolish hunting and raiding parties. On occasion one of these regiments will stay at the tower to guard it, and Evistur will expand his force with the fresh corpses of villagers. As one would expect from a being of Drakwald, Evistur also employs many beasts. Thses include two packs of ravening wolves and his favorite pets, a vicious group of massive bats.
Nearly 200 years ago Evistur had a great turn of luck, as a regiment of Middenland Greatswords marched through his land. They had no chance, and their powerful fighting spirits were bound to his service. Thses are not the only spirits in his employ though. Over the years his many "failed" students have only added to his power. He owns three wraiths and the enraged soul of a thieving witch who attempted to steal his book. Finally, he has one last servant, greater than any other. Long ago, when the tower was founded 2000 years back, Evistur made a pact with one of his fallen kinsman. A creature known to the Beastmen as "The Night Beast", he looks to Evistur when in search of fresh man-flesh, or when the Beasts organize massive hunting groups for him. In return, when the Lord of Death marches to war, the massive creature slinks along the dark trails with him, unseen until the time is right.
(If you read all the way through, I hope you liked it.)
Remember, fight like an ork, but never dance like one. Unless thats your thing.
The Immortal Sons of Change (VC): 3-1-1
It is a good back story for your army.
You could add to it by including the battles you have into the story.
If I read the whole thing? Of course!
And I really like it, it's some of the same ideas as mine, though mine is located in Templehof. I really liked the way you incorporated the magic items, but mentioning the three units of skeletons sounds a bit weird as, in fluff, there are only rank upon rank of warriors with no real sense of tactics.
That said, it's your story and don't let anyone tell you different.
5000p. High Elves
Your story is great! It tells what kind of army you're going to be playing. Evistur will be a powerful magic vampire right? And Karl von Luthran is your combat vampire, but is Itshaf a necromancer or a vampire? I couldn't tell. I'm assuming those poor greatswords are going to be Grave Guard with great weapons?