heres a taste of Lord Of The Bling-Blings have fun
act one: The battle against Suaroff
Galadriel: unay cahutay sumonatuuva astove contruta
the world has changed, I smell it in the air I feel it in the earth , much that once was is now lost, for none now live who remember it
Galadriel: It began with the forging of the bling-blings three were given to the elves immortal and sexiest of all the races, seven were given to the dwarf lords, great drinkers, and smokers of the mountain halls, and nine,.. nine blings were given to the race of men , who above all else desire power, and to get laid.
Galadriel: for in these blings was the power to rule each of these races good and justly, even while drunk, stoned or high. but they were all of them deceived. in the land of Morpot in the fires of Mt. Bong the dark lord Sauroff forged in secret a master bling-bling,
One bling bling to rule them all
One bling bling to bind them
One bling bling to bring them all
And in the darkness find them
Because he couldn't see.
one by the free races of middle earth fell to the power of the bling-bling, but there were some that cost to much.
[battle starts]
a last alliance of elves and men fought back against Sauroff and laid siege to his fortress Barredoor.
Galadriel: victory was near at hand but the power of the bling bling could not be undone
[battle scene]
Galadriel: it was at this moment that Isadoor son of the king took up his fathers sword,.. all five pieces of it, and the bling was cut from Sauroff’s finger. the bling passed to Isadoor who had this one chance to rid middle earth from the bling-bling’s evil forever.
[traveling]
Galadriel: but the dicks of men are easily swayed , and the bling has a will of its own. Isadoor kept the ring but in the end it betrayed him to his death. the ring then came to Gaylem, who took it deep into the tunnels beneath the misty mountains, where it was picked up by a hoebit.
Sellsomeporn: shut the hell up whore.
Galadriel: and in conclusion hoebits are going to change the world, the end.
act two: Dildo's birthday
Dildo: There and Back Again: Why I Didn’t Stay, by Dildo Bagins. On Hoebits, Hoebits have been sleeping with and ****ing each other in the four fartings of the Shrire for many years. Not counted among the great warriors or among the very wise. Hoebits have been content to ignore and be ignored by the “big� people. it has been said that Hoebits’ only true passion is food an unfair accusation as we have developed a keen interest in the drinking of ales and the smoking of weed, but where our hearts truly lie is in clean white sheets and good tilled earth, for all Hoebits share a love for things that grow. Although to some our ways seem quaint it is always brought back to me that it is no bad thing to celebrate an uneedingly complex simple life.
(knock on door)
Dildo: Afrodu get the door there’s someone there. Afrodu, the door! Afrodu, confusticate it where is that boy.
(scene shifts to a grassy hill near a path)
Dildo (in background): Afrodu!? Afrodu!?
Gandalf (in cart coming down path): Ah hun dum ba rum ta pum rump si mun tan bu hump dum hum ba dun (Repeat until come to Afrodu).
Afrodu: You’re late.
Gandalf: Afrodu Bagins, a wizard never late, nor is he early, he arrives precisely when he means to, it’s quite handy in traffic jams. (he and Afrodu begin laughing)
Afrodu: Gandalf ,Gandalf it’s so good to see you!
Gandalf: And it’s good to see you, and how is Dildo the old rascal, I hear it will be a party of special magnificence.
Afrodu: You know Dildo he’s got the whole place in an uproar. He hasn’t invited anyone but everyone’s showing up any way. To tell the truth I’m worried about Dildo, he’s taken to locking himself in his study and he hasn’t maolested me while I’m not looking (Gandalf looks troubled and turns away) all right keep your secrets, it’s been great to see you again. (Afrodu jumps off cart into a rock tree lake orother suitable obstacle. Gandalf continues on to Dildo’s and resumes humming)
act one: The battle against Suaroff
Galadriel: unay cahutay sumonatuuva astove contruta
the world has changed, I smell it in the air I feel it in the earth , much that once was is now lost, for none now live who remember it
Galadriel: It began with the forging of the bling-blings three were given to the elves immortal and sexiest of all the races, seven were given to the dwarf lords, great drinkers, and smokers of the mountain halls, and nine,.. nine blings were given to the race of men , who above all else desire power, and to get laid.
Galadriel: for in these blings was the power to rule each of these races good and justly, even while drunk, stoned or high. but they were all of them deceived. in the land of Morpot in the fires of Mt. Bong the dark lord Sauroff forged in secret a master bling-bling,
One bling bling to rule them all
One bling bling to bind them
One bling bling to bring them all
And in the darkness find them
Because he couldn't see.
one by the free races of middle earth fell to the power of the bling-bling, but there were some that cost to much.
[battle starts]
a last alliance of elves and men fought back against Sauroff and laid siege to his fortress Barredoor.
Galadriel: victory was near at hand but the power of the bling bling could not be undone
[battle scene]
Galadriel: it was at this moment that Isadoor son of the king took up his fathers sword,.. all five pieces of it, and the bling was cut from Sauroff’s finger. the bling passed to Isadoor who had this one chance to rid middle earth from the bling-bling’s evil forever.
[traveling]
Galadriel: but the dicks of men are easily swayed , and the bling has a will of its own. Isadoor kept the ring but in the end it betrayed him to his death. the ring then came to Gaylem, who took it deep into the tunnels beneath the misty mountains, where it was picked up by a hoebit.
Sellsomeporn: shut the hell up whore.
Galadriel: and in conclusion hoebits are going to change the world, the end.
act two: Dildo's birthday
Dildo: There and Back Again: Why I Didn’t Stay, by Dildo Bagins. On Hoebits, Hoebits have been sleeping with and ****ing each other in the four fartings of the Shrire for many years. Not counted among the great warriors or among the very wise. Hoebits have been content to ignore and be ignored by the “big� people. it has been said that Hoebits’ only true passion is food an unfair accusation as we have developed a keen interest in the drinking of ales and the smoking of weed, but where our hearts truly lie is in clean white sheets and good tilled earth, for all Hoebits share a love for things that grow. Although to some our ways seem quaint it is always brought back to me that it is no bad thing to celebrate an uneedingly complex simple life.
(knock on door)
Dildo: Afrodu get the door there’s someone there. Afrodu, the door! Afrodu, confusticate it where is that boy.
(scene shifts to a grassy hill near a path)
Dildo (in background): Afrodu!? Afrodu!?
Gandalf (in cart coming down path): Ah hun dum ba rum ta pum rump si mun tan bu hump dum hum ba dun (Repeat until come to Afrodu).
Afrodu: You’re late.
Gandalf: Afrodu Bagins, a wizard never late, nor is he early, he arrives precisely when he means to, it’s quite handy in traffic jams. (he and Afrodu begin laughing)
Afrodu: Gandalf ,Gandalf it’s so good to see you!
Gandalf: And it’s good to see you, and how is Dildo the old rascal, I hear it will be a party of special magnificence.
Afrodu: You know Dildo he’s got the whole place in an uproar. He hasn’t invited anyone but everyone’s showing up any way. To tell the truth I’m worried about Dildo, he’s taken to locking himself in his study and he hasn’t maolested me while I’m not looking (Gandalf looks troubled and turns away) all right keep your secrets, it’s been great to see you again. (Afrodu jumps off cart into a rock tree lake orother suitable obstacle. Gandalf continues on to Dildo’s and resumes humming)