Jerry Spinger 40K style! - Warhammer 40K Fantasy

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  1. #1
    Senior Member Sister_mel's Avatar
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    Jerry Spinger 40K style!

    In the dark future of the 41st millenia, there is only bad T.V.

    Jerry Springer: “Ok everybody, today’s show is about worshippers of Chaos and the women who love them. Please welcome our first guest, Sister Chastity of the Holy Order of the Slain Virgin. Sister, welcome to our show.?

    Chastity: “Thank you Jerry?

    JS: “ Now Chastity, our producers have told us that you have been seeing someone for quite some time now.?

    C: “Yes. He name is Falthus, and he is a member of the Emperor’s Children.?

    Audience: “BOOOOOOOOO!?

    JS : “Now wait a minute audience. Chastity, isn’t the Emperor’s Children one of Our Most Holy Emperor’s finest Space Marine Legions??

    C: (holding back the tears)?Well, it was, but now that they have fallen from grace…oh, he just sits around the fortress all day and melts people down into drugs! I won’t even tell you what he wants me to do in bed now *sob*.?

    Audience: “Awwwwww…?

    JS: “Well, let bring him out.?

    A Space marine in pink armor with leopard skin tights stumbles onto stage: “All hail our Lord and God Slaanesh!?

    Audience “Boo!?

    JS: “Now now, quite down. Falthus, welcome to the show. Chastity has been telling us there have been some troubles in paradise…?

    Falthus: “Well, there wouldn’t be any trouble is she would grovel at the feet of our merciless tormentor like I tell her to.?

    C: “My love is only for the Emperor!?

    F: “Yeah, that’s why he prostituted your order to the Adeptus Astartes!?

    C: "Oh, go find someone else to wear lobster claws for you!" *sob*

    Audience: “Ooooooooooooooooo!?

    JS: “Well, Falthus, Chastity has told us that she has something to tell you. So I'll just step aside and let her say it.?

    C: “Falthus, you know my love for you is second only to the Emperor, but…well, there is someone else….?

    F: “What? Who the hell. Is it!?

    JS: “Let’s bring out Henrik the Enraged, Mighty Champion of Khorne!?

    A smashing sound is heard as half the stage set falls to the whirling blade of a chain axe. “You are a punk Flathus. Chastity wants a real man, not some whinny little musician and drug addict!?

    F: “You punk a** B****!?

    The audience begins to trample each other to get out of the way of the horrible battle that ensues.


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  3. #2
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    Re: Jerry Spinger 40K style!

    That was so funny!! Write another one!! Write another one!!

  4. #3
    Senior Member MasterBelial's Avatar
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    Funny, hey please write some more LOL
    Master Belial

    'But for corruption thou hast made Belial, an angel of hostility. All his dominions are in darkness, and his purpose is to bring about wickedness and guilt. All the spirits that are associated with him are but angels of destruction.

  5. #4
    LO Zealot
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    One word...LOL
    check out my blog: DRAGONSLAYERO

    HEY!
    I WAS IN THE IMPERIAL (Norwegian) GUARD!

  6. #5
    Lord of the Household BobaHat's Avatar
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    :lol:

    Exellent, man...

    Keep it coming...

  7. #6
    Son of LO BorninDarkness's Avatar
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    :lol: eheheh, that was cool! I wish I remembered the stuff I've seen at GW's forum, occasionally there's a lot of posts with 40K humour. But you seem to be pretty good at this :lol: :!:
    Ze titles yez...
    When in doubt,
    Smite.
    <SilverMane> I would trust BID with my life
    <SilverMane> HEIL BID!
    <Adrian-> BiD is Omnipotent; All Knowing, All Powerful!
    <Scary_Troopers> I see you as an optimist, GT. : D

    But what of the midgets!?
    =]Front in favour of Moderation of the Harshest kind.[=


  8. #7
    LO Zealot
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    Agree :lol:

    Can you try post more, if you got any more?

    Kasutta!
    check out my blog: DRAGONSLAYERO

    HEY!
    I WAS IN THE IMPERIAL (Norwegian) GUARD!

  9. #8
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    LOL.

    LOL. Majorly LOL. This is coming from a guy who hates Slaanesh: LOL.

  10. #9
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    JS: “Let’s bring out Henrik the Enraged, Mighty Champion of Khorne&#33;?

    A smashing sound is heard as half the stage set falls to the whirling blade of a chain axe. “You are a punk Flathus. Chastity wants a real man, not some whinny little musician and drug addict&#33;?
    Where&#39;s the rest of this saga.

    what happened to the climacitc battle between Flathus and Henrik

    Whoso would be a man must be a non conformist
    People should be taught what is, not what should be.

  11. #10
    Lord of the Household BobaHat's Avatar
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    LOL

    I can&#39;t believe that the Champion of Khorne has the same name as my cousin&#39;s husband... LOL

    Can&#39;t wait to see where this is going... don&#39;t stop Mel&#33;
    "We're the Death Korp of Krieg, son. Did you think that was just a pretty name? We never retreat. We fight and we die, that's the Krieg way."
    -Lieutenant Konarski at the Battle of Erebus


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