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Advice and instructions taken from actual military sources.
Some of these guys must have had a sense of humor:
"Aim towards the enemy."
--Instruction printed on U.S. Rocket Launcher
"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend."
--U.S. Marine Corps
"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. The bombs are guaranteed to always hit the ground."
--USAF Ammo Troop
"If the enemy is in range, so are you."
"A slipping gear could let your m203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit."
--Army's magazine of prevention maintenance
"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just bombed."
--U.S. Air Force manual
"Try to look unimportant; the enemy may be low on ammo."
"Tracers work both ways."
--U.S. Army Ordnance
"Five-second fuses only last three seconds."
"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid."
"If your attack is going too well, you're walking into an ambush."
"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection."
"Any ship can be a minesweeper....once."
"Never tell the platoon sergeant you have nothing to do."
--Unknown Marine Recruit
"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you."
"If you see a bomb technician running, try to keep up with him."
--USAF Ammo Troop
<a href="http://www.liquidgeneration.com" target="_blank"><img src="http://www.liquidgeneration.com/quiz/images//Card_Fett.jpg" border="0"></a>
:lol: :lol: :cool:
Take my love, take my land, take me to where I cannot stand; I don't care I'm still free, you can't take the sky from me.
"The difference between gods and daemons largely depends upon where one is standing at the time."- Lorgar
Member of the Fluff Masters Clan
Funny! But I recognize alot of them from a list entitled "Murphy's War Laws" and they werent really real combat instruction, just someone's creative way of making those with thick skulls think twice. I never found anything comical in my Marine combat manual.. except for maybe the illustrations in the back of somewhat poorly drawn sick type guys stabbing each other with knives, but I've also been accused of having a demented sense of humor.
If you're in to that kind of a thing... http://www.murphys-laws.com/murphy/murphy-war.html
Last edited by Sig121; June 1st, 2005 at 01:05.
Many of those are common sense, if a bit obvious. Some are good (the looking unimportant, for example), whereas others are just common sense (the comments about tracers and range).
Wellington had some crackers at Waterloo. On his battle plan:When Uxbridge lost a leg in the battle to French shrapnel, the following conversation occured:LORD UXBRIDGE: Er-herm. Sir.
LORD UXBRIDGE: As I am second in command and in case anything should happen to you, what are your plans?
WELLINGTON: To beat the French.
Wellington goes back to sleepMarvellous!UXBRIDGE: By God, sir, I've lost my leg!
WELLINGTON: By God, sir, so you have!
nyuck nyuck nyuck. Good stuff. I like the rokkit launcha wun.
A man's at odds to know his mind, for his mind is aught he has to know it with.
ABSOLUTELY true!!Originally Posted by friendlyfire515
I am one.
"The sword that takes life gives life."