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  1. #1
    Official Lol Cannon magila's Avatar
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    Warhammer Jokes!

    Anyone got any good.. or bad Warhammer jokes?

    Heres one i made up right now

    "Why did the space marine cross the road"

    "To roll a 3+"


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  3. #2
    Pure Venom. Lordofchange's Avatar
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    How many Slaaneshi cultists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

    Two. But don't ask how they got there.

    LoC
    The only difference between tattooed people and non-tattooed people is that tattooed people are awesome and can kick your ass.
    "War does not determine who is right - only who is left."

    RAMROD ONE

  4. #3
    Member Slann mage Tokes's Avatar
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    Why does the Orc Warboss need a hanky?

    ...cause his nose is filled with Snotlings....Nose Goblins....

    meh you did say bad joke right?
    Peace, lurks in the Jungle...

  5. #4
    Senior Member andrewthotep's Avatar
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    "My carnifex has no nose."

    "How does he smell?"

    "Terrible!"

    Thankyou, thankyou. You're a great audience. I'm here all week. So's the veal.

  6. #5
    Member whiteshields1830's Avatar
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    -_-....all pitiful efforts:

    Why did the space marine cross the road?

    To try to pick up the sister of battle

    *bada bada ching*

    ive got a feeling im drifting too deep into geekism....must...pull away...ARGH!!
    "Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter, and those who matter don't mind" -Dr. Suess

  7. #6
    Father of the Failed rp252's Avatar
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    OK, so you want a bad 40K joke. Please note, I am so very sorry about this joke - it is awful:

    Why didn't the Great Unclean One like the Bloodthirster's jokes?

    They were too Khorney:x

    I'm so very sorry *hangs head in shame*

    "Praise" for rp252:
    Da Mighty Camel:
    No, for your information, rp252 is lonely because he is hideous
    Jaffar_Hasad:
    Behind his ugly bloodthirster face, there's some wisdom stored away for moments like this.

  8. #7
    Member DonkeyKONG922's Avatar
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    lmfao i laughed so hard at that one, nice one!

  9. #8
    Official Lol Cannon magila's Avatar
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    Why didn't the Firewarrior cross the road?

    Because he'd rather stand and shoot!

    OH HO HO!

  10. #9
    Venerable Old One Phobos's Avatar
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    Bindun.

    There once was this Black and White Space Marine on a Black and White Bike, and being the hero-type person that he was, he wanted to marry the commander's daughter. So he went up to the palace, and the guard naturally inquired "Who goes there?"

    To which the Black and White Space Marine replied: "I'm the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike and I want to marry the commander's daughter."

    "Not *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike?"

    "Yes, *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike."

    "OK, pass."

    So the Black and White Space Marine proceeded up to the commander's chamber.

    "Who goes there?" asked the commander.

    "I'm the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike and I want to marry your daughter" replied the Black and White Space Marine.

    "Not *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike?"

    "Yes, *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike."

    "OK, if you complete three tasks, you may take my daughter's hand in marriage" the commander told the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike. "Your first task is to slay the dragon on Xylon III".

    On the Black and White Space Marine's way out, the guard once again asked, "Who goes there"?"

    To which the Black and White Space Marine replied "I'm the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike and I want to marry the commander's daughter."

    "Not *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike?"

    "Yes, *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike."

    "OK, pass."

    The Black and White Space Marine then proceeded with ease to kill the dragon and six months later returned with the head of the foul beast. On his way into the palace the guard inquired "Who goes there?"

    To which the Black and White Space Marine replied "I'm the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike and I want to marry the commander's daughter".

    "Not *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike?"

    "Yes, *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike."

    "OK, pass."

    So the Black and White Space Marine proceeded up to the commander's chamber.

    "Who goes there?" asked the commander.

    "I'm the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike and I want to marry your daughter" replied the Black and White Space Marine.

    "Not *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike?"

    "Yes, *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike."

    "OK, if you complete three tasks, you may take my daughter's hand in marriage" the commander told the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike. "Your second task is to climb the highest peak on Desgrus Beta".

    On his way out the guard once again asked, "Who goes there?"

    To which the Black and White Space Marine replied "I'm the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike and I want to marry the commander's daughter".

    "Not *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike?"

    "Yes, *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike."

    "OK, pass."

    The Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike easily climbed the mountain and returned 4 years later. On his way into the palace the guard inquired "Who goes there?"

    To which the Black and White Space Marine replied "I'm the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike and I want to marry the commander's daughter."

    "Not *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike?"

    "Yes, *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike."

    "OK, pass."

    So the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike proceeded up to the commander's chamber.

    "Who goes there?" asked the commander.

    "I'm the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike and I want to marry your daughter" replied the Black and White Space Marine.

    "Not *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike?"

    "Yes, *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike."

    "OK, if you complete three tasks you may take my daughter's hand in marriage" the commander told the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike. "Your third and final task is to swim across the acid lake outside the palace."

    On the Black and White Space Marine's way out the guard once again asked, "Who goes there?"

    To which the Black and White Space Marine replied "I'm the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike and I want to marry the commander's daughter."

    "Not *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike?"

    "Yes, *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike."

    "OK, pass."

    Once again the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike easily completed his task and returned to the palace for the final time.

    On his way into the palace the guard inquired "Who goes there?"

    To which the Black and White Space Marine replied "I'm the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike and I want to marry the commander's daughter".

    "Not *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike?"

    "Yes, *the*Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike."

    "OK, pass."

    So the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike proceeded up to the commander's chamber.

    "Who goes there?" asked the commander.

    "I'm the Black and White Space Marine on the Black and White Bike and I want to marry your daughter" replied the Black and White Space Marine.

    "Not *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike?"

    "Yes, *the* Black and White Space Marine on *the* Black and White Bike. May I marry your daughter now?"

    "Sure."
    "It fits like clothes made out of wasps!"

  11. #10
    Senior Member AlbinoAlien's Avatar
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    ...............wow.... UGH THAT...WAS........CRUEL
    http://www.librarium-online.com/foru...d.php?t=104497
    PM me about Aurora Prime Vassal fights! Willing and ready!

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