How To Write Like A W*nker.

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Originally Posted by Ghost22

Wow! I couldn't have put that better myself, usually I am quite literate but I must admit that I too have done most of those things. :huh:

But hopefully I won't make an ass of myself on this site by doing something as stupid as that! :lol:

:lol: Hah he did. Oh and I did not really like that article because I write like that all the time. Well I have tried to stop during the recent months. But I do not write Hax0r and stupid stuff like that and I have cut down on the u and neway kind of writing.

[Sharkey]

At last, I get a guide. Now I can finally fit in.

And even using a dictionary requires a basic command of the English language.

Originally Posted by Phobos

Claim False Credentials.

If you're discussing copyright law, claim to be a copyright lawyer. If you're arguing about tobacco's effects on one's health, claim to be a doctor. (No matter what, claim to be a s00per 31337 h4x0r d00d: that always goes over well.) Refuse to provide any substantiating evidence, and for bonus points, grossly misuse jargon.
Make ***** Up.

I actually had this happen to me once. I was playing gunbound and some guy was complaining cause it was a 3v1. The only reason it was a 3v1 was that we had finished off his teammates. And so he starts complaining saying we are noobs and all that and then goes off on a wild tangent saying first that he is the president of the company, all while cursing the crap out of us. Then when we counter with the point that the president wouldn't curse in such a manner, he says that he didn't say that he was president, but the president's son. :rolleyes: We just ignored him after that, which wasn't too hard to do since we killed him 2 turns later. After that he promptly left with a few choice curses aimed at us. All in all, just another great day playing gunbound. :sleep:

[Killer Clown]

Originally Posted by Phobos

Fowler's also notes that the comma-inside-quotation-marks usage is typical of American English, which I consider an oxymoron. That makes all of you people who've written in to complain about my punctuation unequivocally wrong, though since it takes a reasonably technical and careful mind to notice the so-called error I won't hold it against

Not necessarily. All you have to do is corrupt your native European tongue by arbitrarily changing the spelling of words, for example: Armour, colour etc and then replace S's with Z's (pronounce it 'zees' :rolleyes: ) then you're well on the way to creating the red-headed step-child of English a.k.a American-English. Oh... nearly forgot, continue the trend by using imperial measurements while most of the world, including your own scientists and engineers, use metric :wacko:
This is not just an American phenomena though, it is occuring everywhere in English; octopuses, hippopotamuses and platypuses are now acceptable plurals.

Not attacking America here just pointing out that you guys can be Myopic when it comes to the rest of the world. As a teacher, my students and I definitely recognise <(with an S) American-English, as a culturally specific version of English with different spellings for words.
At Australian Universities it is comma and period outside the quotation so I would agree with Mr. Fowler on that point.
A few thoughts
BTW I know this is an old thread, I am a new member so by definition most threads are old to me.

[WarbossAntoni]

Caps locks is cruise control for awesome

[krelios]

As an editor, I find great satisfaction in posting a reply to this thread as my first post to the Librarium. I look forward to sharing this with my colleagues and to posting here in the future.

[nazadan]

Well all I can say is well 'chuckle' Im a new member and already completely lovin this site can i get all this with a t-shirt on?

[ManorrStormbreaker]

Good god... I feel so ashamed!
Well, i better improve then.

Manorr

[stayscrunchyinmilk]

Originally Posted by Phobos

If you're writing for the web, you'll want to post Word documents instead of HTML, and be sure that they're from the most recent version of Word---you wouldn't want anyone to think that you're behind the times (or read your work), would you? Avoid standard document formats like PDF, PostScript and even RTF like the plague: you don't want the un-l33t masses to be able to read your work, do you?

What's that?

p.s. genius.

[JavlinVII]

Let us all observe one minute of quiet reverence, in honour of the passing of the English language.

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yo b ^ 4 40k w/ meh?