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  1. #11
    Ancient Spacefarer Kai-Itza's Avatar
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    Love your Avatar, BrotherAzriel!

    -Kai-Itza-

    15/5/7 6000pts Lizardmen
    18/4/8 5000pts Tau
    Into Kai-Itza's Vault - A WIP Thread

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  3. #12
    Member buttersthewarder's Avatar
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    LMFAO. these pointless upgrades are hilarious. ill post some up as soon as i think of them
    It is insufficiant that I succeed - All others must fail.

  4. #13
    Member Weezhard's Avatar
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    Witch Hunters =][= Pod

    Barbed RaStreisand-11
    :lol:

    Nurgle:
    7 day course of Antibiotics - +2 per model

    Tyranids:
    Tyrant; Finger bowl - +10 points
    Nothing to see here, please move along.
    Thank you.

  5. #14
    Ancient Spacefarer Kai-Itza's Avatar
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    162 (x5)

    IG:

    Upgrade Lasguns to Paintball Guns +1




    -Kai-Itza-
    15/5/7 6000pts Lizardmen
    18/4/8 5000pts Tau
    Into Kai-Itza's Vault - A WIP Thread

  6. #15
    Senior Member PoptartsNinja's Avatar
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    Inquisitors:
    Scathing Sarcasm: +2
    Sub-Orbital Bombardment: +50 (One of your battleships flies a bit to close to the planet. Both sides lose the game, and neither earns any VP because the battleship has crashed into the battlezone.)

    Tyranids:
    Do Acid: +1 (Unit must take instinctive behaviour tests every turn. If the test fails, they must hunt for doritos in the cushions of their couch, and are forced to lurk)
    Subpoenal Glands: +5 (+2 to your 'Intellectual Property' stat)
    Blood-Plasma: +2 (Allows your opponent to take Vampire Count special characters)
    Bondage Exoskeleton: +25 (-2 to all saves vs. Dark Eldar Agonizers)
    Unenhanced Senses: +4
    Expended Carapace: +20 (Carapace absorbs hits on a 2+ until a single wound bypasses it, after which armor value is reduced to a 6+)
    Greeter Tendrils: +10 (Units equipped with Greeter Tendrils welcome the opposing army to Wal*Mart and invite them to partake of the low, low prices)
    Fresh Books: +6
    Eggplant Attack: +12
    Creaping: +8 (Unit assault-distance is halved.)
    Pepper Spray or Taser Tail: +14
    Degenerate: +30 (suffer 1 wound every round on a d6 roll of 6)
    Re-Reinforced Chitin: +8 (Creature becomes weighted down and ponderous, must be modeled with a tub of ice-cream)
    Shutters: +6 (Unit closes any open windows on a 4+)
    Trip to the Spine Bank: +32 (Unit forgot to stop at the bank this morning, is removed from play for three turns)
    More Cysts: +8 (Unit has -1 wound, but is irresistably attractive to units with the Mark of Nurgle)
    Symbiote Trippers +1 (Unit has symbiotic drug-addicts. These get in the way, and eat all the snacks)
    Hornback: +18 (Unit is equipped with airhorns. May avoid being hit by semi-trucks on a 2+. Optimus Prime still hits as normal)
    Rockin' Miasma: +30 (All units in base-contact with this creature must rock out. All creatures in base contact with units in base contact with a unit that is rocking out must rock out. A unit that is rocking out may neither attack, nor be attacked. A creature with Rockin' Miasma may only make attacks against bats, which are killed instantly)
    Big Mac Sacs +14 (Unit is already full, and is unmotivated to fight. -1 Strength)
    Husked: +60 (Unit no longer has any armor. Please model a bathtowel onto that thing, stat! It's creepy!)
    Blinged: +160 (Creature is encrusted with diamonds. All enemy units may fire on this creature every turn regardless of the rules, cover, and line of sight. Unit automatically fails all attempted cover-saves)

  7. #16
    Member
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    I alomst want to take note some these for my guardsmen and take some of them, the comedic value is well worth replacing that lascannon that never hits

    IG-
    infantry: "They killed Fritz!" 10 points; designate one model as Fritz and one as Mac. If Fritz saves against a wound and Mac is still alive, Fritz automatically takes a wound with no save and is removed as a shooting casualty.

    (If you don't get the referance I CAN supply the answer, but where's the fun in that?)

  8. #17
    Teh Nekkid Chatter Killswitch's Avatar
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    Imperial Guard-
    Sweet Leaf - +10 per unit. Units using Sweet Leaf are way to stoned to do anything else except laugh at the enemy troops and make them mad. If the closest target, enemy must shoot at this unit.

    Magic Dust - +25 per unit. Units are high as hell. Move as if in difficult terrain, but on 1D6. Shoot with BS2, have a WS of 2, and must be shot at if closest target (for the enemy).

    'Barry Bonds' Upgrade - +75 per unit. Each unit gains +1 S, T, and WS, and are fearless. You must roll a D6 every turn on the following table (at the beginning of the turn)-
    1 - Depressed - Unit breaks down and cries. Sits there for the turn.
    2-5 - Normal - Unit operates as normal.
    6 - Rage - The unit add's a further +1 S and T, but loose the +1 WS (they are too consumed in rage to actually hit anything.) They must move toward the closest enemy at full movement, and cannot shoot. They gain the Fleet special rule, and increase their charge distance by +D6".

    -J

    I'm back.

  9. #18
    Member Lord Penny Pincher's Avatar
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    Black Templars and Witch Hunters:

    Hurl insults and holy curses: +50pts, for use after losing a game...

    Word Bearers:

    "Debate" with enemy IC: +25pts Use in Shooting phase, both leaders must take leadership tests with a -1 to Ld for each subsequent turn due to the arguing parties losing patience with one another. The first character to fail their leadership test flees off the board in humiliation..

    PS: Amusing to see a Dark Apostle losing a shouting match to an Ork....

    Emperor's Children:

    Lord Commander Eidolon: "Detested, even by own troops" (please refer to the Horus Heresy Novels). Any time Eidolon and his retinue (if he chooses to have one) is not within line of sight of any enemy, all nearby Emperor's Children (within 12") and his retinue will turn against Eidolon. For kicks, this includes other chaos space marines within 12" of Eidolon.

    Tau:

    Upgrade to Kais from "Firewarrior" novel and game: Player must invest all points in his army into "super tau" Kais. The Tau player will face off the opposing army with Kais solo.

  10. #19
    Member Rev. Engineer's Avatar
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    Ladies and Gentlemen, hang on to your wigs and keys...
    it's about to get more Unnecessary!

    Eldar:
    Farseer:
    Corrective Lenses+15

    Harlequins:
    Red Rubber Nose+1
    Big Floppy Shoes+6
    Unicycle+12
    Extra Whimsy+4

    Slaanesh:
    Mardi Gras Beads+1
    Wet T-shirt+3
    Rusty Trombone+10

    Nurgle:
    Mark of Nurgle+10
    Mark's Friend, Pete of Nurgle+15

    Ratlings:
    Stilts+3 per model
    Growth Hormones+5

    Infantry:
    Upgrade one Guardsman to Lovable Misfit+5
    Upgrade two Guardsmen to Siamese Twins+11

    Veteran Sergeant:
    Sweat Stains-FREE
    Extra Grit:+1 per Grit
    Sexually-Transmitted Disease-FREE

    Conscripts:
    Upgrade from Cannon-fodder to Meat-For-The-Grinder+1
    Last Cigarette+1 per model

    Sisters of Battle:
    Adamantium Chastity Belt+5
    Key to Adamantium Chastity Belt+50
    Special Ability:Raging PMS+12
    Upgrade one Sister of Battle to Space Marine In Drag+10

    Grey Knights:
    Psychic Power:Was This Your Card+15
    Psychic Power:Who Farted+40

    Space Marines:
    Upgrade Bolter to Capgun and Vivid Imagination+6
    Power Fist with Power Middle Finger+30

    Terminator:
    Upgrade from Actor to Governor+50

  11. #20
    the mandrake Dracon Bob's Avatar
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    Kroot:
    Breathmint +1
    Dental floss +2
    Tofu +3

    Space Wolves
    Worming Tablet +2
    Flea Collar +5
    That thing dogs do when they drag their behind on the floor - FREE

    Dark Eldar:
    Raider:
    Upgrade from cardboard armour to thin wooden armour +10
    Wyches:
    Clothes +4
    Archon/Dracon:
    Combat drugs not mixed by some guy named Carl in his basement +10

    Squats:
    A Home planet +500

    I tried:/

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