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Simple question, complex answer. Should I stay with my gf or not? We have been together a year and a few months now, and I am starting to wonder whether I should stay with her. She is no good at parties, always throws hissy fits and ends up ruining the night, so I've stopped inviting her mostly. My friends aren't that fond of her. She is completely obssessed with me, wrapped around my little finger, which is good in some ways but also a bit annoying. We argue fairly often too.
On the plus side, when we aren't arguing or at parties we get along pretty well, I can talk to her really easy, XXXedited by censors, we do plenty of other things BF's and GF's do as well XXX I do enjoy being the one in control of the relationship, so it is a good thing in that way too. But it is almost too easy, I do like a challenge.
It would most likely be a very bad breakup, and my first major one, since she is so into me, she would be very upset. That is also holding me back from pulling the trigger. However, she is trying (unsuccessfully) to control my life a bit too much, and I honestly see no long term future with her. But at this stage, I see no real big reason to dump her rather than just taking it casually until it stops working.
I haven't exactly cheated on her, but I have been flirting with other girls which also makes me think that if I'm perfectly willing to flirt with other girls I'm really not as much into the relationship as I may think.
Now this poll obviously isn't going to make my decision for me, and I've probably left a fair bit out, but I just thought it would be good to gather opinions. Then when i do roll the dice to determine what I do, the major opinion here can give the result +1 or -1 depending on how it goes.
Dah! I have the same problem with women...the letting go of em part. I'm in a relationship right now where i'm wondering if i shouldn't just high tail it out of here, but i've decided to give it some time. As for you, i don't think waiting till it stops working is such a terrible idea, but it really isint fair to her if your not into it.
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It all boils down to a single question: do you actually love her?
And, is this the right place to ask? O_o
Sorry, cannot offer any advice (pah! long relationships are overrated! ).
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I feel your pain, but have you talked about it with her ? tell her the EXACT same things you said to us.
I had a similar relationship but I never talked to her about it. Don't make my mistake.
oh and in case you are wondering how it turned out.
I did dump her in the end and then I realized I threw away 3 years of my life. a time that I could have spent having fun with friends.
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To be honest, it would be more fair to her to let her go. If you really are not that into it, she is not going to really enjoy it and neither are you. Dude there are a million other girls out there and a million other guys. She'll get over it and I think if you keep stringing her a long it will only hurt her more. You'll be happier because you'll find a cooler girl and she'll find someone more suited to what she wants to do. EVERYBODY WINDS
She doesn't take hints all that well. I was wondering if there was a way to slowly make her less attracted to me, but I can't help being so irresistible.
Once in a longtime relationship I think it's easy to forget from time to time what it really was about the other one you first noticed. You start taking the good things for granted and focus only on the negatives. Then they'll grow and kind of hide any positive sides.
I'm in a 16 year relationship, so we've had our ups and downs and surprisingly often I think the bad things I see in her, when things are bad, are reflections of me that I would find in any woman I'd ever meet.
But then again I do know I love her.
So, my answer is... I don't know I'll still vote though...