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  1. #1
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    Divorce - Acceptable?

    Many married couples, which may or may not be in abundance on LO, have most likely had that time in their lives where something has gone horribly wrong. Some weather the storm, but others break under the heavy burden and the result could possibly end in divorce. But this doesn't only affect the couple, it affects friends, relatives and has a big impact in the future of their children, if they should have any.

    Whilst I am not of age, and as such cannot sympathise, but only empathise at their plight, I was wondering what the rest of you on LO thought of the divorce - is it ethical? Is it, in your opinion, right that divorce is legal? What of the consequences?

    EDIT: I live in Australia, where divorce is legal. However, I completely forgot that other countries might have laws which define divorce as illegal. If one feels offended, please forgive me for this slight. :cry:

    Last edited by Schmeag; November 27th, 2005 at 10:05.

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  3. #2
    Back in action! Lord Yossanrion's Avatar
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    I think divorce is fine. I think it can often be a sad occasion, but sometimes it can also be a "normal" occasion... the former couple depart friends, but not lovers.

    It should be legal, after all we don't need all this stuff about "its bad." Its worse for two people to be forced to live together.

    My parents have argued, but they've never split up. My Aunty, and my Uncle (one of two, both from my mother's side) have both had rather *nasty* divoce experinces, some very, very painfull. I might mention them later. The consquecnes were damn nasty, but It wouldn't have been nice if they had stayed together. Especially for my cousins (who, by the way, turned out fine. Well, most of them. All bar one (but thats another story, and I don't think it was becasue of the divorce.)).

    All in all: divorce is a common part of realtionships these days, and should definatly be legal. People who have experinced divroce are not messed up, and are some of the best people I know.

    I hope I haven't offended anyone.
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    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Yossanrion
    All in all: divorce is a common part of realtionships these days, and should definatly be legal. People who have experinced divroce are not messed up, and are some of the best people I know.
    I agree with you. However, from my experience, being the child of divorced parents certainly isn't the best way to go. Whilst couples may benefit from divorcing, it is not always the child that will benefit. Without a loving father-and-mother relationship, their upbringing will be different, if not marred somewhat.

    It gets rather complicated when the mother remarries again, not to mention the father, and both have new kids. The child is not entirely whole, one part being in his/her father, the other in his/her mother and as such, will suffer for it.
    Last edited by Schmeag; November 27th, 2005 at 14:49.

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    The Uncivil Servent Mikhail The Heretic's Avatar
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    I actually come from a broken home my parents split when i was 13-14 i was going through a difficult time due to perthes disease affecting my right hip and all the subsequent operations that i had to endure. My parents at this stage were fighting every day and the atmosphere in the house wasn't pleasant, i had difficulty going outside due to being confined in a wheelchair/crutches yet i wanted to be anywhere else but in the house. Had my parents not split up i can tell you one thing i don't think i would be a more rounded individual if anything had they stayed together, i would proably be having a lot more problems in my life than i do now.

    Don't get me wrong i know that it affected me i have great difficulty even now maintaining a longterm relationship with the opposite sex But I still feel that this would have been better than the alternative.


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    The Pacifist Wargamer Quick's Avatar
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    No!

    Divorce is unacceptable!! :realmad: Once you've cast your lot in with a spouse, you play that string until the end!

    just kidding.

    People change, you may not be the same person you fell in love with and married; the person you married may not be the same person as he or she was when you got married. There's no sense for two unhappy people to be unhappy together.

    The only thing that can be hoped for is that the separating couple can be civil about their split, and that they ensure that their children (if they have them) are not traumatized by the split.


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    Quote Originally Posted by Mikhail the Heretic
    I actually come from a broken home my parents split when i was 13-14 i was going through a difficult time due to perthes disease affecting my right hip and all the subsequent operations that i had to endure. My parents at this stage were fighting every day and the atmosphere in the house wasn't pleasant, i had difficulty going outside due to being confined in a wheelchair/crutches yet i wanted to be anywhere else but in the house. Had my parents not split up i can tell you one thing i don't think i would be a more rounded individual if anything had they stayed together, i would proably be having a lot more problems in my life than i do now.
    Unfortunately, I would have prefered it if my parents had not divorced. I for one can say that I have been tossed out of the frying pan into the fire. I took the divorce OK, being too young too understand what was going on anyway. But its side effects became a big factor in my life to come. Both my parents remarried - my stepmother turned out just fine. My stepfather, however, is a different matter. Heated arguments began to crop up in my seventh year, which escalated into more frequent and violent arguments, encompassing the whole family. Now, we are not on speaking terms - the only word that we say to each other each day is "Hello", and even then no words are exchanged. As such, I usually stay away from him to avoid the tense silence that follows when we are together. As such, my social life has really plummeted and I often feel the same in the company of others.

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    Daemonette Nagato's Avatar
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    Whilst it was the impact of legislative changes that increased the opportunities for divorce they did not affect the desire or motivation to divorce. The demand for divorce was there prior to the legislation being implemented but it was the ability to divorce that was lacking. Since the implementation of divorce laws divorce rates have risen steadily but just because people can divorce does not mean that they will A far more likely reason for the rising divorce rates are the economic, social and cultural changes that took place over the course of the twentieth century. In more recent times family size has decreased which has meant that there is a greater ability to divorce both financially and socially, as couples no longer have large families to be responsible for. It is easier to bring up one or two children as a single parent whereas it is harder to bring up eight or nine. As the Age of Marriage increases people are less likely to divorce, as they are more aware of what a relationship involves. Increasingly people cohabit before marriage and therefore are far more aware of what marriage would mean. Increasingly people are not bothering to marry and as fewer marriages occur so there will be less divorces. There is also a greater awareness of sexuality and sexual experiences you are no longer expected to be heterosexual or even a virgin on your marriage bed. But lets not forget the victims of the Divorce, those are the kids that a married couple could have. The scars from a divorced family, that can leave in a kid, is uncureable by even time itself.
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    LO Zealot Arakiaz's Avatar
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    I'm from a broken home aswell, but luckily for me I can't remember my parents living together, since they divorced when I was 2 years old.

    I think that divorces are acceptable, since it most of the time is better for all parts, including the childrens.
    I've seen many couples who IMO should have had a divorces ages ago, but stick together, either because of cultural norms or for protecting their childrens. But instead the children are suffering because there is no love at home. Children need not only love from their parents but they also needs to feel the love between the parents.

    I don't say that divorces are good, but sometimes it is the best thing for all parts. (It kind of sounds wrong, but I can't make it sounds right in English, so I'm just hoping that you understands my point)
    Dragons do flame.... but only when they are upset or they want to


    According to new signature rules my hydra (the only reason for it to be here was to please Caluin) have been removed. But still dragons pwnz hydras anytime

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    Wave Man Kahoolin's Avatar
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    I think at this stage it's too late to wonder whether or not divorce is OK. It's all around and that's not going to change.

    In my group of friends at high school only 3 out of 11 of us had parents who were still married to the people they originally married. The other kids had single parent families or step parents.

    How could you justify taking the right for people to separate away from them at this stage?

    Personally I think one of the biggest reasons for the climb in divorce rates is movie stars. I know alot of actor types and many of them are very egotistical and selfish, plus they tend to rush into things. Whenever I see a star get married to another star after dating for a couple of months I think of my actor mates and think "yeah I'm sure THAT'S going to work out." You can't have a relationship where both people are naturally selfish and always want the spotlight.

    So what happens is the media and society in general idolizes these people and then instead of trying to weather the storms or even waiting a few years before you marry, people marry quickly just like their idols and then as soon as they hit their first fight they go "you're not giving me what I want! I want a divorce!"

    Anyway that's my pet Dr. Phil rampage for the day

  11. #10
    LO Zealot Arakiaz's Avatar
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    The media have their influence, no doubt about that. But a factor is also the time-spirit. Now all peoples have a very busy life, where career is highly prioteted. The demands of education, even when finish with schools. Besides that comes all the extra meetings and so on. That leaves little time left for the family. Which over some time must couse some troubles, which simply can't be sorted out. And unfortunately childrens most often suffers within these.

    Ofcouse it is the best for the children to live with both parents, but the time-spirit simply doesn't always aloud that.
    Dragons do flame.... but only when they are upset or they want to


    According to new signature rules my hydra (the only reason for it to be here was to please Caluin) have been removed. But still dragons pwnz hydras anytime

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