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I for one found this movie a waste of my time and my money. I went to see it with my friend Johnny(A slightly fanatical Christian...) and he thought it was a masterpiece. Apparently, we had a small clash.
Now, as a 'non-believer' of the Christian religion, I didn't see the point of this movie. Maybe it was to draw people in to the religion, maybe it was to get little kids to understand the religion, or maybe it was made for Andrew(He shares my name.) Adamson to make 'oodles' of money. Whatever it was, it didn't appeal to me.
Now, I don't know if it was because of the cheesey(Bible like) storyline...Or maybe it was that Peter kid. Yes, it was the Peter kid. Now, I was always told not to take out a weapon unless I intended to use it. How many times did he pull out his weapon? Twelve times? How many times did he use it? Twice maybe? I don't see what he was trying to accomplish by pulling out his shiney sword. Was he trying to blind his enemy? Maybe he was, but that's about all I saw(I think I fell asleep during some of the movie...) him do. I don't even think he killed anyone on purpose. He drew his sword on the wolf, but the wolf jumped onto the sword. What a bummer, the wolf kicked ass. I was tempted to walk out of the movie after that scene, but Johnny told me to watch the rest of the movie.
The next part I actually tried to remember was the lion getting killed. That was the best part. I laughed when he died, Johnny just stared. Following suit, the people in the theater stared at me. I couldn't help it though, it was funny. Death is funny for me. Especially when Jesus...I mean Aslan dies. Sorry for that, but that was the basic story.
If you want the script, just read the bible. That's all you need to do. Read the frikkin' bible. Exchange some names and there you have it; Narnia: The Movie.
There you have it. My (Short) thoughts on the (Long) movie. If I had remembered anymore, I would be drinking myself into forgetting it.
Overall Rating: 1/54484468484646546684848496361469
- Review by GamesmasterZ :Aka: Andrew -
No offense intended, but that review was terrible.
First of all, have you read the books, or seen the original movies? They can't exactly change the storyline of something this well established to fit your wants.
In my opinion, it was worth the money, worth the time, and was overall a good movie.
The music was very well written, and the movie was very emotional at times, which means that it was effective. It didn't fit precisely to the books/old movies, so I'd suggest to everyone wanting to see it to not go expecting a perfect reincarnation, but instead to go just to enjoy a movie.
A bit of the acting is lacking, but is made up for by other characters and scenes.
Overall, I'd give it around a 3.5/5, or even a 4/5. It's nowhere near as terrible as is being said.
You're right, my review was terrible. Poorly written, poorly explained, and left many questions as to what I thought of the movie. Let me give a better review.
WARNING: I have not read the books and I never intend to.
Moving on to the review.
When I walked into the theater, the normal thoughts hit me. What are we going to see? How much is this going to cost me? How much is popcorn? What is that smell? Well, Johnny and I wanted to see King Kong, but we couldn't make up our minds which one to go see...A giant monkey with CGI elements or the Bible with CGI elements. In the end, we left it up to the flip of a coin. So, God must've wanted me to waste money on a movie, so we payed for two tickets to Narnia. I took a piss, thinking of how I was pissing my money away on the movie. The bathroom smelled like horrible ass, so I imagined the theater wouldn't smell any better. I was correct in my theory, the screening room smelled just the same, if not worse, than the bathroom. Alright, I've set the mood, time for the movie.
After sitting through thirty minutes of Disney previews, the movie started. I honestly don't remember what came before the Luftwaffe bombing the place, but I really don't care. That opening scene kicked quite alot of ass, honestly, it was worth the $3.00 I payed for the movie. I mean, it was awesome, better than anything else I had seen at the beginning of a movie. I kind of felt like I was right there, filming the inside of that bomber from my smelly, sticky theater seat. So, we'll just say the very first scene of the movie was the best scene. But that's only if you take the kids going to the bunker or whatever it was...out.
Now, let's fast forward to when they're in the country. What does the professor do? That's what I was wondering. What does he do? Did he design the A-bomb? He sure looked like he did, that hairy bastard built the weapon that bombed Hiroshima. WHY!? Anywho, moving on. They were playing hide and seek, seems cool enough. But then, the older ****-head brother takes the little girls spot. What an asshole, I would have stabbed him just for that. So, she runs into a random room which happens to have a cloth covered wardrobe. Magical indeed. I wonder how, in all the rooms in that house, she stumbled into -that- room. Well, even after all the questions I had in my head, she stepped into the wardrobe itself. When I used to play hide and seek, I hid behind a tree or something. Understanding that she didn't have a tree, it made sense to hide in the wardrobe. But, that's besides the point.
Damnit. Work. I'll try and continue this tommorrow or when I get home. Once again, I'm sorry for the weak-ass review I made in my first post. But I'll continue this tommorrow, so stay tuned.
TBH, I'm in total agreement with Lost Nemesis.
I saw it today and liked it a lot. I'm not really Christian myself, but I don't think it was supposed to have a point...it just wasn't one of those films.
The way I see it, its a remake of an already fantasic, set in stone story, though I haven't read the books before so, I'm not sure if anything was changed, but I do remember the basics from the other T.V screen makes.
I too thought the music was great. The piece with the train at the start and in one or two other bits of the film was a nice score. Plus Harry Gregson-Williams is a god when it comes to film scores IMHO.
My only real gripe is the lack of blood, lol, but its a Disney film, so what can you expect. So I can live with that.
On a side note. The Fox rocked! ^.^
But aye, 3.5 / 5 from me.
Want to chat? You can normally find me in the LO CHAT!
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I don't even know what you're talking about. I don't think you even know what you're talking about. It was a well done film - and while it was no LOtR - it was very good in its own respect. From a movie standpoint - it was filmed well, the actors were quite good (although many people didn't like Edmund, I think he did an excellent job of being a little brat which was perfectly in character). This movie was one of the better I have seen this year (and I have seen a lot) and it is not just for kids or for christians. Personally, I think that movies in the theater are never worth how much they cost (although I attend them faithfully regardless), but this is definitely one of the more worth your money films this year. I would suggest it.
Don't bother. You've said enough, and made your position quite clear. With the language you use, I don't think I even want you posting on these forums at all. I suggest you tone it down in the future. This subforum is not a place for you to rant and complain - it's for reviews. Negative reviews are fine, and even encouraged, but not in the manner that you have gone about.Originally Posted by GamesmasterZ
As for the movie, I didn't find it anything spectacular. It's nothing I'll ever buy on DVD, though I don't feel I wasted my money in seeing it. I would've thought it as a bargain for three dollars. I even suggest people go see it in the theatres.
I didn't care too much for the live acting. Edmund seemed forced, Peter seemed fake. The two girls played their parts well, however, so I was pleased with that. I was dissapointed with the witch however - I kept thinking "Gabriel" every time I saw her.
The CG was amazing, however. The Lion was masterfully done, almost to the point where a few times I thought they had a live lion talking. The minotaurs, hippogriffs, satyrs and such all blew me away.
The biggest problem I had was how "light" it was. When I read the books a long time ago, it always seemed to be a very dark world until the end. Shadows and such. I didn't get that feeling with the movie - once the thaw started, everything was very bright and cheery, which sort of detracted from the mood.
The movie was well done. There are a few things I could nitpick at, such as riding horses cross country with the crowns on, but all in all, it was still enjoyable. If for nothing at all, the battle between the two armies was amazing. Centaurs versus Minotaurs for teh win!
Game, your pretty pathetic. Sociopath mean anything to you?? If so, try to develop some empathy.
Anyhow, I agree with Caluin, it seem more dark in the book and the lighting drew away from the profoundness of the story. I don't got to church or what not, but I liked the story somewhat. Yeah, some how when I saw the witch all I thought was Gabriel too... that kinda stunk.
Ok, I will drop my opinion of the movie right now.
It was horrible.
I thought the books were great and the animal animations were great, but aside from that, it left me completely dissappointed.
What do I dislike most about it?
The acting was wretched. I absolutely hated the kids through every second of their dialogue. It reminded me of Excalibur in terms of hokeyness and horrible expression of feelings.
And folks, let's keep this from becoming a flame war, I'm specifically talking to YOU, Lictor.
I am not going to feed off your accusation, Ezekiel, I was trying to make a point. You should follow your own advice.Look above, I mean come on! Does this look like a healthy individual?The next part I actually tried to remember was the lion getting killed. That was the best part. I laughed when he died, Johnny just stared. Following suit, the people in the theater stared at me. I couldn't help it though, it was funny. Death is funny for me. Especially when Jesus...I mean Aslan dies. Sorry for that, but that was the basic story.