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  1. #1
    Senior Member Sancraer's Avatar
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    The Leader of my Army

    (Fluff is in italics, if you just want to comment on the rules go to normal text)

    Now the fluff of my army is complicated. Basically, Laura, who is essentially a rogue pysker, was born with great pyschic potential. However, her ability emerged when she was at the peak of emotions, feeling immensely angry, sad and lonely yet also immensely happy, supported and loved. The extent of these emotions in addition to a rift in the warp being created accidently by her already caused her powers to expand rapidly, making her one of the most powerful pyskers in the galaxy. She could equal Varro Tigurius, or even Eldrad Ulthran in his prime. She is the daughter of the Emperor and she WILL FIGHT FOR HIM.
    However, she disagrees with the ways of the Imperium, she believes that many xenos, especially the Eldar (and sometimes the Tau) are potential allies and all three races should combine to stop all the threats to this galaxy. Laura and her friend Josh (an incredibly mentally gifted child who has a "friend" who gets him blueprints and parts for almost anything, aid the Eldar craftworld of Iyanden in a battle against the Ultramarines. In the battle Laura is forced to face off Tigurius, but is not ready and so cannot overpower him. Marneus Calgar then arrives and tries to punch her, so she grabs a nearby body of an ultramarine and then teleports back to the webway portal.
    From the geneseed of the dead ultramarine and stolen information, Josh manages to recreate the process of creating a space marine, and so the Chapter: The Endless Shadows begins.

    Laura is human and so is more attuned to the powers of the warp used by space marines, but has attempted to learn the Eldar powers for greater effect (and to see whether it was possible). She has been given great artifacts by the craftworld as they see her potential and Josh manages to re-create the Imperiums technology. Under the wing of the Eldar, she plans to create her own space marine chapter, to aid the Imperium and prevent evil. She tries to avoid battle with the Imperium but sometimes they attack her, mistaking her for CSM. Laura plays on this to keep her chapter hidden. The only time Laura attacks the Imperium is when Iyanden are forced to to save their craftworld or when Iyanden attack to aid their craftworld when against an Ultramarine geneseed (Laura refuses to use others as she dislikes the defuncts in them).


    Now I know this fluff could be considered far-fetched and such a character would have been mentioned. My story is that the Imperium don't actually know about her, only the high counsel of Ultramar do and they're keeping it to themselves. It is the same with the Eldar, with only the most profound characters such as Prince Yriel, who plays a key part in accepting her (being a corsair/ranger he is understands Mon-Keigh a lot more. Also, Laura disguises her chapter as CSM when fighting against them or just an ordinary SM chapter when fighting with them (allowing me to alliance with all the races on the good side in apocalypse, and none of the bad).

    I created Laura
    A). An awesome leader
    . For a novel I'm writing
    C). To allow my SM, eldar (and my eventual guard, inquistion and tau) to fight together
    D). So I could have a hq known as a "Chapter Mistriss" or "Lady Laura"



    Anyway, enough fluff. Heres the rules:

    Laura: 300pts (this is the hardest part).
    Ws:5
    Bs:5
    S:3
    T:3
    W:3
    I:5
    A:3
    Ld:10
    Sv:3+/3++

    Wargear
    Powered Rune armour (in profile) (the best rune armour available on top of standard power armour
    Bolter/Bolt Pistol (SM codex)
    Staff of Retribution: Master-crafted force relic-blade(S6, force weapon (main rulebook), master-crafted (space marine codex)
    Jump Pack/Autarch wings

    Special Rules (these create the 500pt cost I think)
    Master Pysker: Laura knows all the powers available to space marine librarians
    Fortelling: +1 WS+BS to the any squad that Laura joins
    And they shall know no fear: see Space Marine codex
    Combat Tactics: see Space Marine codex
    Independent Character: Min rulebook
    Alien Alliance: Laura has acces to 2 of the pyschic powers available to Eldar farseers (chosen pregame).
    Runes of Warding: Eldar codex
    Runes of Witnessing: Eldar codex
    Eternal Warrior: rulebook
    Emotion: Laura's pyschic strength allows her to use three physcic powers per (now without being specific this is player turn, but I think gmae turn is less broken and more fitting to 5th ed rules) turn. In addition, her warp presence is so great it counts as a physchic hood (see space marine codex). She may not use the same power during one (game?) turn

    Thanks guys.

    (p.s. can comments be about the rules please, a line or two about the fluff is fine but not a whole post full of it, thanks).

    Last edited by Sancraer; March 15th, 2010 at 18:47.

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  3. #2
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    Fluff:
    I'm all for home-brew characters so long as they have sensible fluff and a decent power level. Being the 'most powerful pskyer in the galaxy' is a bit of a silly starting point if you ask me. Also bringing canon characters into the mix is also a bit odd, your character stands up to Calgar and Tigurius and lives to tell the tale. One does not just 'recreate the process of making marines' the tech is lost to the mechanicus who would have infinitely more resources so that doesn't really fly. How exactly do two human individuals aid an entire craftworld against attack?

    All in all I am not a fan of crazy and far out fluff. Tone it down and make it reasonable. Most sensible reason for a psychic female leading a SM army would be an inquisitor. They as standard are powerful humans with psy powers that have the power to co-opt what ever resources in the Imperium that they want.

    Rules-
    Yes she maybe 500points (which is ridiculous for one model!) but is still stupidly powerful. Adding +1WS and BS is crazy, WS5 termis? Yes please... The mix of marine and eldar powers doesn't sit right with me and the mash-up weapon she wields is down right beardy. Also she is human, humans are T3, not 4 just because you want to make it harder to wound her.

    In review the fluff doesn't work for me and the rules are a bit all over the place.

  4. #3
    Senior Member Doomlord's Avatar
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    ok here i go, first of i see this model as ridiculus overpowered. 500 pts is way to much, i would price her around the same points as Abbadon, or Lysander, acctualy i would price here at the same price as Ahriam or Tigrus. She can use three powers a turn, pleas state if she can use a power multiple times, and if she can use multiple shoting powers in one shoting phase. She is to easy to kill for 500 pts, EW is good but still T3 (you have writen T4 in her profile) as you stated your self is far to easy to kill, even if she is in a 10-man strong marine unit.

    About the fluff: It is some parts of the fluff that is to far fetched but they are still abel, the one thing i reacted on was the fact tha some one was abel to begin construction marines like the Emperor did, is just TO far fetched, if you mean like the Apotchecaries do whit the neophytes it may not be that farfetched.

  5. #4
    Senior Member Sancraer's Avatar
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    1).I understand what you mean, as said in post it is extreme. (BTW when did I say she was most powerful in galaxy because I didn't mean to say that, so sorry if i did). (also she doesn't face off calgar and tigurius, she holds off tigurius for about a minute and then teleports away when calgar arrrives cos she'd get ahnihalated). However I do not want an inquisitor, I want a rogue pysker.

    2).Also, her friend and her don't create marines, they steal geneseed from the ultramarines (and succesor chapters) and use the same method as they do. If this still isn't possible then I'll say that she got the documents from a dead inquistitor, and pretended to be one to recruit a chapter to her aid.

    3).Mainly the fluff was to get a human/space marine alliance with eldar. I knew once i'd written it that it was extreme hence my paragraph of trying to explain why GW don't "know" about it.

    a). Rules wise, ye T3 is more fitting. I got T4 as i made her out of Tigurius, a chapter master, Eldrad and a standard farseer. If I change this formula to a SoB inquistor and a SoB canoness rather than eldrad then that makes her T3.

    b). Concerning pyschic powers, I've always though it strange that one race uses different powers to the others, is there a reason for this? If not eldar powers are staying (only two though, and they're factored into cost).

    c). So doomlord, your saying 500pts is too much? This is what I thought too!!! I was just trying to avoid posts of cheese.
    but ernie your saying its too little?, In response to this i'd say she can only kill max about 100pts per turn and won't get first turn kills so 5 turns(ish)X100=500. I also calculated it by adding together fractions of the models mentioned baove.

    d). For staff of retribution. would a relic force blade be better? I thought the 3 attacks were a big enough limit but?

    e). Three powers per turn. none the same, (otherwise we'd be seeing 3 fortunes on 30 TH/SS termies...)

    f). Finally what do you guys think of runes of warding and pyschic hood? Is this too much pyschcic protection

    ps. made changes to original post (rules not fluff)

  6. #5
    Senior Member Doomlord's Avatar
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    I like the new changes, and the point cost is nice. but still she is to easy to kill for 300 pts, a normal marine can kill here more easily than he can a normal marine, thas why i said around the same cost as Ahriman and Tigrus. As you stated yourself she can not kill that much in one round.

    Rune of warding + pshyckic hood i think is alittle bit to much, it could work if the Rune of warding only functioned inside the range of the hood.

    The staff is nice like it is now, the only change i would do is make it str 5 instead of str 6, whit str 6 she can kill MC creatures to easy then. If you do decrease the strengh, make here cost alitle less to.

  7. #6
    Senior Member Sancraer's Avatar
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    For the staff how about an option to -1 iniative for +1 strength (starting at 4)? Its the rules that I always though powerfists should use. Fluffwise it would be the more time she spends powering the staff, the stronger the hit. Makes the weapon unique and quite tactical.

    Remember she can cast fortune (okay, i didn't put that in the mathhammer but hehe). Thats a 3++ with rerolls (and the squad rerolls), pretty hard.

    How about 225pts?

    And just so ernie knows, fortelling is in place of Tigurius' reroll reserves and a change of guide. Fluffwise she "sees the enemy" movements and sends the "image" to the subconsciousness of the squads brain. (maybe a physchic test for this would be fairer, in which case what about 200pts?)

    Thanks guys.

  8. #7
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    This character should be two or three seperate ones really.

    a normal marine can kill here more easily than he can a normal marine
    How can a normal space marine kill a I5 W3 T3 model with a S5 power weapon easier than a normal space marine? A normal SM can't kill her in one round and is likely dead before he swings anyway. 500 points is far too many points for one model, but 300 points is far to low for what this model gives your army. Has anyone who wants 300 or lower actually looked at this unit?

    First of all you have a Farseer with a 3++ and and jump-pack style thing and at least 3 attacks with a S5 force weapon and immune to ID
    Then you have her having a psychic hood and making all enemy psykers do it on 3d6, as well as having 3d6 pick the two lowest
    And then you have her knowing all Libraium psychic powers plus two eldar ones and gives +1BS +1WS to units she joins.

    My God, and people want it cheaper?. Just imagine Fortuned TH/SS termies, a Fortuned obscured Land Raider, any combo involving doom and competant assult troops. How on earth is this comparable to any other 250 - 300 point character in the game? This thing + suitable unit could eat any other SC + suitable unit in the game, nothing else even comes close. Personally I don't like this character as it basically goes "Lets see how stupidly overpowered I can make a unit without doing a solid 10 stat block". And at 300 points this thing would need a rule that goes "At the start of each turn roll d6, on a 2+ she instantly dies from the pure concentrated over-poweredness and is removed" to balance it.

    /End rant.

  9. #8
    Senior Member Sancraer's Avatar
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    You can't cast fortune on space marines. Read the eldar codex. It says it may only be cast on eldar units. (Same with guide). Better?
    I'm making the runes of warding 24". Again better?
    Doom ye, but you can do that in apocalypse anyway (and when would I run this model in under at least 2250?
    BTW the pistols extra attack is incorporated in her profile.
    Eldrad is just over 200pts if i remember correctly, and thats a farseer with T4, a 3++ and similar rules. Mines just faster and harder in combat.
    +1 WS, +1BS to the unit is good, but only one unit...
    She can still only use 3 powers per turn, she just has more choices.
    But I sww what you mean, maybe 325?

    Stupidly overpowered is: a 2+ armour+inv +permanent cover +WBB + FNP; S weapon and an extra attack each time she hits a model.

  10. #9
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    Hmm appears I didn't read my codex as closely as I thought, as I missed the thing with fortune.
    I still think 325 points is too low as the CC ability alone would be 200+ points and the psychic abilties would be 180+ aswell.

    From a fluff view tone down the uberness, and also drop the inclusion of named characters. Its concievable that a human psyker could hold off a librarian, and maybe with one of Iyandens farseers helping her could hold off a strong one. But Tigurius is mentioned because he is such a powerful psyker and it isn't a good idea to bring in GW characters just to make yours look better. Its better to create your own characters for your stories as it gives you far more flexibilty. Her having a psyker duel is fine if written well, but stay away from Tigurius.

  11. #10
    The Future realitycheque's Avatar
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    Err... no. To any of it. Those rules are INSANE.

    The fluff is pretty nuts, but those rules take the whole damn biscuit factory.
    My Deathwatch Campaign
    Furious Angels: (SM) W22, D1, L9 (BA) W15, D0, L3 | Sentinels of Saphery (HE) W3, D0, L0

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