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2 explorers decided to go explore the depths of a wild jungle, in order to get famous or make somesort of breakthrough discovery.
They'd travelled for days through the wilderness and their guide was dead, eaten by some wild animal (a killer monkey or something...but thats not important)
While resting after a hard walk a bunch of savages jump into the clearing and take them prisoner. They are tied up and carried to the savage village.
From the bones littered around the village, the explorers deduct to their horror that these are infact cannibals.

They are brought to the center of the village and tied to two poles there. The village goes insane with sounds, hoots and whistles until suddenly it all stops and a elderly man walks out of the crowd. He wears the headdress of a leader and he walks all the way up to the two explorers. Then he starts speaking in pretty good english.

"You now have a can choose death *he nods in the direction of his warriors, all brandishing blunt clubs*...or you can choose Kiki."

The elderly leader looks at the first explorer. With a sideways glance at his colleague he answers.

"Well Kiki ofcourse!"

The elderly leader says.

"Very well, you have made your choice. Kiki it is."

All of a sudden all the men in the tribe rush forward and untie him. The carry him abit away and throw the explorer on the ground. Then all the men in the tribe proceed to have sex with him, then when all of them are finished they beat him to death with the blunt clubs.

The elderly leader walks back to the explorer, after having taken part and asks him:

"You now have a choice, Death or Kiki."

The explorer responds with grim determination.

"I choose death."

The leader responds.

"Very well, you have made your choice. Death you shall receive....but first Kiki!"

3,575 Posts
Hehe, now I remember what the cannibal joke I heard was about.

The adventurers had the choice between death and 'mao-mao' (or something). The first one picks mao-mao as he doesn't want to die. So he gets a pineapple shoved up his ass, which hurts like hell, causes bleeding and drives him utterly insane, but they let him go.
The other guy has seen this, and of course doesn't want to suffer the same fate, so he choses death.
The cannibal leader then replies: "Okay, you shall receive death. Death by mao-mao!"

Yeah I know I'm crap at telling but I can't remember exactly how it went.
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